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Do you let ex in your house?

26 replies

ADVICENEEDED987 · 30/01/2024 20:10

Ex and I have been separated for a few years and the children and I live in the former martial home (it should soon be sold if we can finally agree the split of our finances).

At the moment ex comes over to see the kids one evening a week here and whenever he drops them off/picks them up at weekends he waltzes straight in like he still lives here.

Once the house is sold and I have my own place I'm thinking of not letting him in like this. I would happily invite him in for a cup of tea from time to time or have him wait inside if the kids aren't ready to go when he arrives to collect them but I don't want him encroaching on my space/pushing boundaries like he is at the moment (he wanders around, goes up stairs, looks at post or paperwork on worksurfaces etc. when I ask him not to he says it's his house so he can do what he wants).

What do others do? Does ex come in to your house, would he see the kids at yours? How do you put boundaries in place to protect yourself whilst not upsetting the kids? It will be their home too and I don't want them to feel that their Dad is banned from the house but I also don't want him there!

OP posts:
ADVICENEEDED987 · 12/08/2024 00:28

hildabaker · 11/08/2024 14:53

Your ex sounds horrible and annoying, OP, like a dog regularly pissing in his spot, to show ownership. I hope you sell quickly.

Also, get a safe and keep documents in there, locked. I don't trust him.

That is exactly how it feels, like he is making his territory. He had got a little better recently although the other week he turned up 30 mins early to get the kids, no text to let me know, just let himself in whilst I was in the shower. It felt horrified walking out of the bathroom in just a towel and he's there in the house.

OP posts:
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