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Lone parents

Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

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Original poster

Leaving kids home alone

20 replies

MummyRM100 · 02/01/2024 06:26

Just after other people's thoughts. I'm a lone parent to DS who's 12 - in Year 7. DS is very sensible and for the past year has been left home alone with no issues for an hour or two several times a week. We both have trackers on our phones so can see each others location all the time.
I would love to be able to go to the gym at 7am for an hour before work, a few mornings a week but I don't feel comfortable leaving him home alone at that time. I'd get back home for 8 to wave him off to school
I have a friend who does this, no issues. What's others views on leaving a 12 yo home alone in
Bed at 7am ?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Ascubudr · 02/01/2024 06:26

I think this is fine.

rochethenut · 02/01/2024 06:27

i leave my 11 and 14 year old at 5.45am 3x a week to go for a run. Back at 6.30

Both still fast asleep! They know i go and utterly unphased and it’s been like that for over a year

BoohooWoohoo · 02/01/2024 06:28

I would do it if he was ok with the idea. What worries you? Is it the possibility that he might not get up and do his teeth etc so he can stay in bed longer?

Sugarfree23 · 02/01/2024 06:30

I'd do it as long as he knows where you are.

SoulMole · 02/01/2024 06:30

We often do this with our 12y/o. Just make sure he has a fire plan and a way out if needed in an emergency.

PPTorPDF · 02/01/2024 06:32

I have a year 9 and wouldn't do it in the morning. I like to sit with him before school and chat about stuff while we eat breakfast etc. I hate the thought of him getting up alone and sitting eating his breakfast etc alone so it's a no from me.

BobnLen · 02/01/2024 06:33

We used to leave DS at that age, I guess you would make sure he was up, then he would be just having his breakfast and getting ready for school. The main thing I can see is to make sure he is up😀

BobnLen · 02/01/2024 06:35

if You left him in bed and he overslept would he have enough time to get ready for school when you get back

Trinity69 · 02/01/2024 06:36

I leave home at 7am to go to work and leave my daughter (12) at home in bed every day.

Aria20 · 02/01/2024 07:06

What time does he have to get up for school? My 12 yo has to leave at 7.15 for the bus! I'd trust him to still leave on time... but my 15yo would def stay in bed and miss the bus and be late for school if I wasn't here!

Definitelylivedin · 02/01/2024 07:23

I think it's fine.

Newchapterbeckons · 02/01/2024 07:39

Why are you worried? Do you think he will be unnerved waking up alone? Will he be late every day? Will the mornings become stressful?

daffodilandtulip · 02/01/2024 07:46

When mine were Y6&9, I worked 60 miles away. I woke them as I left and they sorted themselves out and got to school. Sometimes I think they preferred it, as I annoy them now if I speak to them while they're getting ready 😂

MintJulia · 02/01/2024 07:50

I left my 12yo home for an hour and a half, while I ran ParkRun. He had his breakfast and his computer. I carried my phone and was about two miles away.

But not on a school day. Mine would just have gone back to sleep. .

Oblomov23 · 02/01/2024 07:54

I can't see this issue and don't even understand why you're asking. I leave for work before ds2 even gets up for school. I give him a shout as I go out the front door.

itsgettingweird · 02/01/2024 07:57

My ds is a swimmer. We are at pool at 5am.

I know many families who leave other children at home in bed and sometimes even 5/6yo where the teen is at home too.

I don't see an issue with it. Families have to do what works for them.

FawnFrenchieMum · 02/01/2024 08:00

I can’t see the issue at all. My year 7 gets herself up and out for school when I’m working away from home and her dad leaves at 6am for work.

EarringsandLipstick · 02/01/2024 08:25

I leave my 16, 14 & 12 yo at home while I go to the gym / train at 545 am. Home by 715.

I've done so for a few years now - so the youngest was younger than your DS, but my eldest was old enough to keep an eye.

For me it works because I'm back in time to make sure everyone is up & get ready for school. They are usually up but if they weren't, there's still time. I'd be a bit less comfortable with only arriving back when it's time for them to go.

It depends on your DS & how reliable he is. It's also harder if he's on his own - my 3 will get each other up, though it's mostly my eldest who does.

MigGirl · 02/01/2024 08:32

I don't think it's a problem, I leave for work at 7.30am and on the days DH has already left both DS13 and DD16 are left and have to sort themselves out. Both have been doing this since they started year 7. No breakfast club in high school so they need to learn to be a bit more independent.

Original poster

MummyRM100 · 02/01/2024 19:41

Thanks so much for everyone's replies. This has really helped. Gym it is tomorrow morning then !

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