Alone at Christmas?

[SchrodingersBrexit]

DD will be at her dads Xmas afternoon and evening. For the first year ever I think I'll be spending Christmas alone.

I'm not quite sure how I'll deal with it on the day. I've been dreading this for months.

Stupidly, I feel quite embarrassed that I'll be alone. I'm dreading friends asking me.

Just wondering how others cope with it.

I don't have children but I'll be alone this year
For me I just treat it as a day of relaxing and do whatever I feel like
Get nice food in, plan what to watch on TV, usually start a new book and have a long bath, have a nap. Often do a peloton ride or workout. Sounds really boring but I enjoy it and not feeling like I should be doing other stuff like cleaning!

Don't feel embarrassed!

Just say 'it's DD's dads turn to have her this Christmas'.

I was the same the first one apart from my kids but really it was fine.

I think friends will ask me who I'm spending Christmas with if DD is at her dads. And when I tell them, I'll get sad faces and "thinking of you" style messages on the day

But hang on, try reframing this. You ARE with your dd for Christmas morning with all the waking up stocking, presents, excitement etc. That's what you tell friends (and yourself) if you don't want pity texts. Just say dd will be with me on Christmas day and then she's going to her dad's in the afternoon and I'll enjoy crashing out in the sofa.

As above, you have your DD in the morning, in the afternoon you can relax and watch nonsense on TV in your fluffy pjs and eat what you like! An alternative option would be to find a friend you can pop into in the afternoon for some nibbles and a glass of something..! Either way, all on your terms and no pressure. Embrace it, nothing to be ashamed of at all. I suspect many people would gladly take your place ☺️

I would travel to a place where Xmas is not celebrated if I was you.

I've spent every Christmas afternoon alone for 12 years - me and dds dad separated before she was born so we split the day.

I usually order a Chinese lol, have a bath, listening to a podcast with a glass of wine. Then tidy up the carnage from present opening, and sit down with a tub of chocolates in my new fluffy pjs and dressing gown haha! Always try to save a series to watch on Christmas Day - this year it'll be The Crown .... then obviously Eastenders special haha!

Most of my friends know the situation and we all do the merry Christmas messages but no one ever mentions I'm alone or draws attention to it

Enjoy the morning with your DD and then relax and enjoy the afternoon and evening watching what you want on telly with a box of chocs/mince pies/cheeseboard and whatever you like to drink.

Agree with PP to enjoy some peace and relax, enjoy some time just for you.

Also Christmas is a period of time not just xmas day. It doesn't matter who you are with on xmas day as there are plenty of other days other the period to spend time with your daughter.

I'll be alone too, OP. My DS will go to his Dad's around 3ish. I just sprawl out, get a good film on and pick at food from the fridge.

My exH/DS's Dad left me on Boxing Day 2016 so I always get a bit reflective around this time of year but I have trained my brain not to dwell on the past too much and it gets easier with time.

I'll be exhausted come the evening anyway as no doubt DS will have me up at 5am!

Me again - watch something that really makes you laugh out loud; nothing too deep and meaningful. And don't get drunk. I think that's all 🤣

You will have a lovely morning with DD, then relax for a few hours, eat what you want to eat, watch what you want to watch on tv. Relax. Think of it as a few hours, rather than being alone as Christmas. The reality won’t be as bad as you have built it up in your mind, if you have been dreading it for weeks. You will be ok OP, good luck

Seems like overkill for one afternoon!

OP you'll be fine. No need to be embarrassed at all, if anyone asks what you're doing at Christmas then you've got DD in the morning then she's off to her Dad's so you're going to enjoy the peace with a nice meal and a film. Simple.

If you get an invite and you want to accept it, then do! Don't assume it's out of sympathy, lots of people have a 'more the merrier' open door attitude to Christmas. I've lived a long distance from my family and spent many Christmases in the bosom of other families having a great time.

If you stay at home then get yourself some food in that you enjoy, a drink of whatever it is you like best, a good film or a new book or whatever makes you most happy.

I’d enjoy a stress free day, stay in my onesie, put the slippers on and have some snacks and wine and binge watch some favourites on telly. Or put some chilled Xmas music on…Just first time in a long time just enjoy me, me, me. Do whatever heck I want.
Then my kid comes home to tell me all about his lovely day while I listen eagerly lol