Would this work for a 50/50 split with a 5yo?

[Levithecat]

Hi all, I have 2 DS age 5 and 10. Have been 50/50 with their father for 3 months, after a year of being 100% with me (he is in recovery for alcohol dependency, may or may not be relevant to answers)

our 50/50 is 2,2,5,5. This was because we felt a more frequent swap was better for our youngest at his age. But they’re finding the two nights with me or their dad disruptive, even though those nights are consistent.

Has anyone done a week on / week off with a 5yo? I was thinking I might be willing to do this if perhaps the youngest stayed with the other parent for one night in the middle of that (giving us both 121 time with each boy, and meaning more frequent contact for the youngest with each parent).

What do you mean by 2, 2, 5, 5 if they're consistent nights?

Outline a normal fortnight

Currently -
week 1
monday, Tuesday with mum
wednesday, Thursday with dad
Friday to Tuesday mum
weds to mon am with dad
so always mon and Tues with mum and always weds and Thurs with dad

Sounds a bit messy and confusing for everyone. Can't do just do one week each? I wouldn't know if I was coming or going.

Yes we could, it just feels a long stint for a 5 year old - general advice was to have more frequent handovers when they’re small

I’ve got 50/50 with my sons dad since he started school at 4.5. Over 6 years in and still going strong.

What’s your pattern @YerAWizardHarry ?

Week on, week off swap on a Sunday to get “settled” for the new school week.

That sounds good, @YerAWizardHarry - we’d probably do Monday switch. Ok general response seems to be it’s a good pattern. I’ll have a chat with their dad.

We do 30/70. So dad has the same 2 weeknights and about 1 in 4 or 5 weekends. I find that's enough 🤓

We do:

Sun night, Mon night- Mum
Tues night, Weds night- Dad

Then we alternate Thurs, Fri & Sat night

We split the week up because of our working patterns and because DD misses the other parent if she's away too long.

Alternating weeks here. LO struggled massively with the one night/two night pattern in place we had before. This is suiting her perfectly. Also if you think ahead to when they might start doing after school if they want to do something which is a Monday/Tuesday or both then that’s all you will do. You won’t have the time to just chill at home which is just as important as swimming or whatever they would like to do.

It is a big jump from 100% with you to 50/50 .