Doing all travel for contact

[Hopelesslyn]

Ok so I’m just looking for some advice really .
when I speak to people in rl I feel they side with me because they are my friends so honest opinions most welcome .
so bit of background . Ex husband two sons (9 and 13) . Been split for over 7 years.
I drive he does not . I always did the drop offs pick ups as I wanted to keep the peace (I was the one who instigated split)
we used to live about a 20min drive away and he refused to collect as it would be to difficult for him . The children were little so it was easier to just continue to drop them.
I have since moved further away for the last 3 years . Drive now takes an hour via car . Because I moved away I have been doing drop off picks ups but I have recently had another baby with my partner.
with working life and a new baby it’s becoming increasingly difficult to do both drop offs and pick ups as he only has our sons for one night . So drop off is at 12 then we collect at 5pm the following day.

is it unreasonable for me to say he needs to either collect or bring back the children ? Or to meet half way? Everything I read has pointed out that I moved further away so I should be the one to continue to drive them.

AIBU to ask for some input in travelling to and from his home?

You shouldn’t have been doing it all along. It should have been shared however given ages of children it was better for them because he can’t drive. However, now it’s way trickier because you moved so it’s way harder to make that change. Maybe suggest he gets them half way but I don’t know if he is a reasonable person or not.

It’s not easy managing access and a new baby.

If you moved, morally you should probably be doing most/all of the travel.

Realistically, the courts would look to share travel equally regardless of who moved (in my experience, but this might vary by judge)

Hey. Why don't they go for 2 nights but half the time? If that makes sense. Surely that would be a lot more productive for everyone. So you continue doing the driving but technically you will be doing it half the time.

Thank you for your replies

I was thinking of something similar recently but due to his work he would need to book Friday as annual leave to have the boys the extra night .
I thought of putting this to him as a compromise as during the months with bank holidays he wouldn’t need to use annual leave . I don’t think he will be reasonable about this idea though .

You've been more than accommodating imo. I'd say he needs to meet you half way as your life has changed ect, if he starts then just say you either meet half way or come get them himself. If he starts saying you're stopping his contact tell him your not, he is by not meeting you half way
.