Child maintenance / school uniform

[FruitBadger]

Could someone please check my logic about maintenance and what the other parent provides, please?

Husband and I separated a few months ago. He currently has the children 4 nights out of 14, 2 of which are mid-week and has said he will start paying maintenance in line with the CMS calculation "soon". This evening I spoke to him about school uniform for our two children for September as many of the retailers are starting sales. I suggested that I buy uniform as I would have done in previous years and he makes a contribution of 20%.

He disagreed as he believed the maintenance he will start to pay should cover school uniform.

My logic was that I am responsible for 4 days of school uniform and he is responsible for 1 day, and the discount in CMS payment for the number of nights he has the children reflects this. Also that it made more sense for me to purchase it all at once and him contribute a share, rather than him go out and buy a complete set, because we can then split multipacks of polo shirts, for example.

Have I completely misunderstood how this works or does my suggestion make sense? This isn't a hill I'm going to die on but am I right that his CMS reduction reflects that he should provide clothing for the day the children are at school?

Your suggestion makes sense but unfortunately CMS doesn't take into account anything like that so its whatever you agree between yourselves. It's just calculated on their salary, any other dependants they have and the number of overnights; logical division about stuff like this isn't covered.

I would buy it all though and ask for some money towards it as no doubt if he ever does school pick ups or whatever it'll get mixed and bits that are 'yours' will stay at his.

Thank you. CMS aren't involved, hopefully we won't need to go down that route. We've just used their calculator to see what should be paid going forward.

That was my logic, but he bristled at me asking for the contribution as he felt it should come out of the maintenance. My logic was he'd already had a reduction in maintenance to allow for this.

The maintenance being theoretical currently

I don’t think you’re being unreasonable at all. The reduction in CMS for the nights he has them is to account for the cost of what the children need when they are in his care. Which would include uniform.

Perhaps suggest that alternatively you can forget the uniform money if he back pays the maintenance he hasn’t started paying yet for the last few months?

He's jointly responsible for the children so should pay half of all their costs regardless of how often he sees them. That's my opinion, not an official position.

I used to get cams that was calculated plus 50% of school uniform costs. Plus extras towards their extra curricular activities whenever he could afford it.

Your calculation sounds fair, but give him a choice. He can give you 20% of the cost (based on nights), or 50% of the cost (based on them being his children too), or he gives you nothing towards it and makes his own purchases.

He veers between being very reasonable and un utter cockwomble at the moment. I suggested 20% hoping he'd actually suggest 50/50 but was surprised he was anti even that.

Just remind him that he is responsible for everything the DC need while they are with him, including their clothing. Tell him you will be buying uniform for the DC for your days on x date and unless you hear from him before then you assume he will buy his own. If he says you are being petty/cheap etc say no, you are following the cms process.

Thanks all, just wanted a sense check 😀

With my DP he pays dsd mum a weekly amount and when it's school uniform time I pick up bits and bobs she will need then pay half the costs or buy what mum says she hasn't bought yet

It's simple- you have children you split the cost

Sorry your ex is being nasty. It's the kids who will lose out and he's being too stubborn and selfish to even realise.

This sounds very reasonable. I wonder what he will choose.

I also like the idea of just asking for the backdated child maintenance

Just so you know the majority of the time that calculation from the website is not correct. Bare that in mind, my partners says he's should be paying a lot less than what cms actually say.

Legally..... he doesn't have to pay more than cms says as it's supposed to cover the day to day living.

Why is he not paying you maintenance already?