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Lone parents

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How to get over being a lone parent, new to this

5 replies

Flpresto · 15/11/2022 14:14

Dp left me quite abruptly when I was 7 months pregnant, just didn’t come home and had taken his stuff over the course of a week when I was at work. Never heard from him again other than for him to tell me he wanted nothing to do with us and what stuck to his word 8 months later.

I feel so shit. Money is a worry, as is returning to work and costs of childcare. Life is just surviving not enjoying. I still don’t think I’ve processed how harshly he cut us off, it makes me feel totally worthless and terrible for dc too. For context ex is well into his forties and lives alone. I wrestle all the time about how or why he could be so cruel.

OP posts:
SpinningFloppa · 16/11/2022 08:50

Have you posted before? Was the child planned? Sounds like he didn’t want to be a father? Sadly you can’t force someone

Mischance · 16/11/2022 08:51

Has he been chased up for maintenance?
I am sorry that life is hard for you at the moment.

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 16/11/2022 08:52

Is he financially contributing?

Justmeandme19 · 26/11/2022 20:06

That is so so brutal of him. Honestly how have you even begun to get any closure?
He is a total coward, his actions are 100% about him. It's nothing to do with you.

Fireyflies · 26/11/2022 20:16

Would it be worth asking him to meet up just to talk through went he did as he did? Not to try to change his mind but just to help you get a bit more closure on why?

But being a single mum can be great. I was over for 6 years, from when DD was 3 months old. It's hard, and lonely at times, yes, but you also have complete autonomy over your life. You can take your DC where you want, when you want, stay out as long as you want. Do you get any help from parents or friends? Appointing god parents can be a way of getting more significant adults into your child's life, if there's anyone suitable (and possibly even some help with childcare)

Do make sure you're getting what you can from your ex financially. He doesn't get to opt out of that.

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