How often does your 4 year old see their Dad?

[Kaffiene]

Very complicated but split from Ex Jan, I moved out with DS in Feb. Access arranged by social services for the first while. No regular contact since May.

ExP wants to see DS this Sun for 2 hours then can’t see him again until maybe 3 weeks time. I have said I am not willing to re start contact until we have a schedule. DS is finally in a good place at the moment. I don’t want him destabilised again. I have asked he sees him once a week even if it’s for just an hour. I would like to work towards mid week and every other weekend. ExDP says he can’t commits

For context DS is 4 EXp lives 5 mins a way, is a teacher and already takes time off work to collect his GFs kids from the same school that DS goes to nursery at. I aM not being unreasonable am I? DS needs a schedule with regular predictable contact.

Does he want contact? I think I’d just wait and see if he fizzled out and disappeared.

Sorry to slightly change the subject but how come social services were involved? I think this will play a big part in the dicision making?

Agree what we're the circumstances that led to SS involvement? Are you confident da is safe in his care? He doesn't sound too interested anyways so not sure this is worth pushing. I do think something more regular is important than as an when he can be bothered. Poor effort if he's 5 mins away and makes me think even more it's not worth pursuing

DS would like contact but he is talking about it less as time goes on. I don’t think he would recognise him in a crowd anymore.

I think ex wants people to think it’s me stopping him from seeing DS when actually he can’t be bothered, which is why he keeps suggesting outlandish things that he knows I won’t agree to. I think it will fizzle out.

social services are involved with DD who is 14 and disabled. The contact schedule was to meet her needs mainly. She is currently living with exDP until I can get an adapted property (told you it was complicated!) We see her twice a week. We collect from school & drop her home. ExDP doesn’t come out.