I’m struggling with 9yr old as he reminds me of my ex, he is like him in many ways but particularly his lying. If we’re having a fun day he will cause an issue or become grumpy for no reason mirroring what his dad used to do. Family days out or occasions were frequently spoilt by dads behaviour.
i have just taken my 2 away for a holiday all was going well until 3 days before we came home 9yr old suddenly gets very clingy doesn’t want me to leave him even tho I can’t anyway as it’s just me and 2 kids. He basically then tells me a whole story that dad leaves them on there own most weekends in his flat for approx 30mins while he goes shopping. This story was backed up by 6yr old. I asked questions and was what seemed credibly answered, also wouldn’t of actually put this past ex. I had no reason to doubt them as it all seemed credible. He continued discussing it on and off for the last 3 days.
so fast forward to us coming home today and I’m so angry that they have been locked in the flat etc. so this evening I confronted ex to be told he has done it once. I have then re asked 9yr old and he has now admitted lying and dragging his brother into the lie. No reasons whatsoever just did.
i don’t know what to do with 9yr old. I have noticed the lying and devious behaviour happening more but nothing like this. i often feel like it’s attention seeking but how the hell do I deal with it. I struggle with the constant reminders of ex’s behaviour in him and am at a loss of how to deal with it