What a crap day

[ohwhatfreshhellisthisnow]

Today is the first day in a long time that we haven't had plans, I spent ages setting up the pool for dd (4.5) yesterday morning, cleaned thee slide so she could slide into it, got ice lollies etc, thinking we could have a nice chilled day, just the two of us.

It's been hell. She has been in the pool for about twenty mins in total. Moaned she's bored, wanted to go to the park (I said no as it's 31 degrees), had a tantrum over a pair of socks, asked for her face to be painted so I did it, only for it to be wiped off on her fresh bedding when she was crying over the socks.

I am so stressed about work/childcare/money issues etc, so my patience is very limited as it is. So it's just been shit. And to make it worse, all I can hear are happy families in their gardens, having bbq's etc, and let's not get started on all the lovely pics going up on Facebook.

She's currently sitting on the iPad. And has been for the last hour. And there are still two hours til dinner to go. I just give up.

Aww bless you! Sounds like she is calm now and enjoying being on the Ipad, so I would honestly leave her to it! Can you do something you enjoy like read a book or paint your nails?

Don't be too hard on yourself, kids can be little brats.

Cut yourself a whole lot of slack- you are doing this solo!!
We’ve all had terrible days where we have felt like giving up. You are a great Mum who is just trying her best under a lot of stress.
kids know exactly what buttons to press because they have been with you since birth!
If you want to gain control of the tantrums and the stropping I highly recommend 1-2-3 Magic by Thomas Whelan. It’ll make you feel like a totally awesome parent.
It was a saviour for me :-). The kids hated it because it put me firmly back in control. But it was SO effective.

It took a weekend for me to implement it. Was a trying weekend and I drafted in some help but at the end of it I just had to say”1” “2” and the stropping and whinging instantly stopped!!

You sound like a lovely mum for trying to give your child a nice day and it is a horrible feeling when what you had planned all goes wrong.

I hear you about work/childcare/money issues - it is incredibly stressful. However, one of the best pieces of advice that I have read on MN is that we shouldn't put our mood/stress onto our child - and this would also relate to patience levels. Please don't think I am having a go at you, because this is still something I am working on, but keeping on top of our patience is important because the stresses of the world are something that should not be put upon our children.

So I feel more patient with my children, as pp said I have previously used Magic 1-2-3, but now I am more inclined to give myself a time out - take myself away from my children, use deep breathing and distraction until I am calmer.