Mother in law

[EMCBHOC]

Hi mums, I have two kids both girls ages 1 and 2, my daughters 1st birthday was the other day and my ex mother in law has bought her a photoshoot for her to get photos done with the kids, but she doesn’t bother with the girls at all other than once a week for 2 hours that I have to bring them up to see her, her dad also only sees them in that time aswell and he doesn’t really want the photoshoot, I think it’s a bit of an inappropriate gift to buy a 1 year old. She has always been very ignorant to me and me and my ex broke up because he cheated on me and she is expecting me to take them to the photoshoot so they will behave to get the photos done!! I really don’t want to do this but she is not giving up!! What will I do? Will I just take them to avoid anymore conflict

That’s not a present for your daughter but for your MiL. On the other hand, if it means you get some nice photos of your DC why not?

Up to you. If you want some photos then take your dc if not and it’s more hassle than you can be bothered with, I’d just ignore it and not bother.

Because if she wants the photos she'll have to pay for them. Plenty of places do the sitting free.

@EMCBHOC given she treats you badly I'd tell her 'NO'. She can sulk all she likes, what's she going to DO??

She wants to get in the photos with the children and leave me sitting watching!! Their dad doesn’t even want in the photos

And I also don’t get the photos there for her she said if I want some I can buy them from the photographer

That’s not a gift for a child, that’s your mil being selfish and wanting some pictures to show off with.

Tell her that she’s welcome to take your child to have photos done if you’re willing to allow it, but that when you take your children for a photo shoot it will be because you’re buying pictures for yourself and grandparent presents. It doesn’t matter if you piss them off, they add nothing to your life, and clearly they piss you off already. Your feelings matter most, because you are the mum.

When you say she doesn't bother with the kids except 2 hours a week, you are doing a disservice to her. That is more often than most grandparents seeing their GC, and you should be grateful for that.

I would be tempted to let her pick them up for the photoshoot, assuming she has the proper car seats. And I would expect at least one photo of the two girls! Get Dad to pick them up.

If that’s what she wants, she can organise it without your help.

2 hours a week is a lot.

If you're not in the photos or getting a photo then they do this in Dad's time.

I wouldn't make any effort to arrange it or organise it. If that's what she wants she can do all the leg work.

I would stop.enabling them all.

You are already bringing them.up.. you don't need to run around for them.