Dad come back in contact after leaving

[Babygirlmum]

Ladies I need some advice, my baby dad left me back in September pregnant and told me he doesn't want anything to do with our baby and he does not want to be a dad he made this very clear and continued with this, I have since had my beautiful baby girl she is now 12 weeks old and I have been in contact with child maintenance as I thought it was only right he paid for his daughter since doing this over a week ago he has been in contact with me wanting to see the baby and asking to be a part of her life, I really want to know why it's taking him 12 weeks and a child maintenance letter to get in contact and all of a sudden he wants to be a part of her life after being very clear he wanted nothing to do with her he didn't want to be her dad he put me through loads of stress while pregnant didn't want our baby asked me to get a termination now all of a sudden want to be dad of the year. Any advice on this as I'm in brain freeze mode.

I would offer him weekly contact at a time and place to suit you for a period of 3 months and then offer to build up contact into him having her a few hours on his own once she is weaned, working up to full days and overnight once she is over a year old.

He may well not bother after the first few weeks or he may step up and become a great Dad.

Set your expectations low and do not let him dictate contact or mess you around.

If he took you to court then he would get child contact. I would be telling him that he was welcome to start to court process.

For babies so young it won't be overnight or anything drastic like that.

This is why some people don’t claim maintenance as yes paying for a child a lot of men think they might as well see them then I would give it a chance

You won't make sense of his actions. And there is no point asking as he will say what he thinks is the right thing

Hopefully he has realised he is a parent and he wants to step up. Maybe someone has said something and he realises that having a child and not being an active parent makes him a bell end. 🤷‍♀️

Just remember you have 18 years of this. Such a small baby he needs to show he is committed. As previously suggested I would offer him every Sunday at x time for 2 hours with you there. As she gets older you can step back. As I understand courts don't like over nights for such small children. So you can see if he steps up and build on this.

Agree with others offer something.. Otherwise if he goes to court you look in the bad light..

He may think you will just drop CMS case..

You can meet him in a public place..I met my ex at a soft play centre when my son was little but its up to you where you think would be suitable at that age.