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10 replies

lostdad · 03/01/2008 14:15

I'm a non-resident dad of a 1 year old boy. My ex left with him while I was at work at one day when he was just a few months old with no hint that anything was wrong. She's since divorced me without saying a word to me.

The only contact I have with him is court-ordered and that is just a few hours a week. Before she left I cared for him as much as she did. Shortly after she left I was not allowed to see him at all for over four months, with no reason given.

I've joined to try to see things from `the other side' because it is something I am having severe problems with. She refuses to communicate in any form whatsoever, aside from the odd email.


OP posts:
DavidTennantsMistress · 03/01/2008 14:18

hello there, welcome to the gang! sorry you've had a rough time of it from the sounds of things. but hello all the same.

Lomond · 03/01/2008 14:27

Hi and welcome to MN (glad you didn't let the name put you off!).

Sorry you have had such a bad time of it, there is always loads of support on here so keep posting.

Lomond · 03/01/2008 14:46

You must really miss him for you. I can't imagine not being with my children.

madamez · 03/01/2008 14:50

SOrry you have had a bad time. As your son gets older you may be able to ask for more contact with him and get it court-mandated. Appreciate that it is difficult if your ex refuses all contact with you, but try and remain polite, friendly and reasonable as much as you can for your son's sake.

lostdad · 03/01/2008 15:13

I'm good at staying calm and polite, even with what has happened last of year. And the accusations of anger management issues (officially disproven). As well as the allegations of domestic violence and abuse of my son - and not to mention those stating my parents are not suitable to look after my son, nor my sister in law (a new mother and a qualified nursery nurse!)

I even stayed calm when my (ex) in laws called the police on me because I said I wanted to take him for a walk in his pushchair.

I'm good at calm. Not at trusting anyone however!

OP posts:
yerblurt · 03/01/2008 15:31

welcome lostdad, I'm another dad

I suggest you get yourself over to dads-uk, it's a free forum for dads with plenty of no-nonsense practical advice.

also think about joining families need fathers, there is probably a local branch nearby to you.

btw I've been through the court system and have a shared residence order for my daughter, my ex tried a few similar stunts to yours.

mistletoemiggins · 03/01/2008 19:43

welcome lostdad

we dont bite and the lone parents thread is for everyone whether mum or dad or infact whether lone - we get good advice & support from married parents too who've been there & come out the other side

glad to hear you are calm - it confuses them PLUS you will know that in years to come you did your best - thats all you can do for your children

dip into other threads too for light relief

mummyfantastico · 03/01/2008 20:17

Hi lostdad, can i swap you for my xh? You sound much nicer!

Rosasmum · 04/01/2008 20:49

Hi Lostdad

I am sorry that you are having to experience such a sad and frustrating situation but well done on remaining calm and polite. It does sound as if you have had a few battles already.

How old is your lo now? Have you considered asking through the courts for an increase in time?

Rosasmum · 04/01/2008 20:50

Sorry, just reread your first post and realised you said your son is one.

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