my exH's nice GF has just called me a "F#cking B#tch" cos I phoned to speak to MY CHILDREN

[mistletoemiggins]

I am fumming

I rang my inlaws house early (4.30 instead of 6pm) to speak to the children & she answered. She is obviously at my inlaws while they have gone out with my children & daddy - obviously spending all day yesterday with them was too much for her & she needed time alone.

All I did was ask he to get my ex to phone when they got back....she then shouted at me for not phoning at 6pm as arranged & when I pointed out that my MIL wouldnt mind me phoning early & that it was none of her business, she shouted "go away you FB"

Im livid & gobsmacked. I have gone out of my way to make sure I never say anything negative about her to the children so that they are happy & secure, and thats the respect I get.

Im sure some people will think its only words but it was completely unprovoked & I just dont use language like that.

At least I didnt retaliate and will phone at 6pm as I have been told.

then my ex wonders why I dont want her sitting outside the car when he brings them back - she is just so 2 faced and aggressive.
Nice person to be around my children - my DS said they have a shouting box that daddy & GF put money in if they shout

Im sure his parents dont say anything BUT sure my DC talk all the time about "mummy this" & "mummy that"
sounds like she doesnt make much effort with the children though so thats her own fault.

then I look on the Step mum threads & realise that a lot of mums are very hard on their exs regarding access etc so just wish my ex would come on Mumsnet & realise how nice I am to them both
all I want is a little respect!

for you MrsM

BUT, revel in the thought that she probably has been compared unfavourably to you whilst there, and his parents have probably been speaking about you in a kind way too, along with your LO's.

The one who maintains the moral highground is always the winner. You've had a lucky escape, and, your ex has jumped from the counter - straight past the frying pan and into the fire

Your children will always come before her with the IL's. Your IL's will always have a good reason to not upset you. You have so much power in your hands........

VVVQV you're right - never really thought about the fact that my ILs will be more concerned with my DCs than her and if I was still in the picture, I would still be top as the mum (never made them feel like that though - his parents are lovelyt salt of the earth people & were truely devastated when he left)

But I dont want power - just want respect - not too much to ask is it.

And I have foudn a new DP when wasnt looking who is so good to me - I am a firm believer in things happening for a reason so maybe someone up there believed I deserved better & so got rid of ex so I could find DP

EXACTLY

I thought you had a new man, but couldnt remember and didnt want to say the wrong thing......

You are entirely in the driving seat here. His family are eating out of your hands - and they want to. Your children will always be there, take priority over everything - including money. She's made a really sucky decision and she knows she's only got herself to blame. Whilst you are revelling in your new relationship, not jealous of her AT ALL, carefree (well not - but she probably thinks so), and there is NOTHING she can do. Except call you a "fucking bitch" when no-one is looking.......what an achievement for her......

Mrsmiggins, I remember when you and your xh were breaking up and I 'spoke' to you quite abit on your thread. My computer got a virus soon after so I lost MN until last year.

Sorry to hear you're having such problems with xh and his gf but really glad to hear you have a lovely new dp

ur probably right
my ex has let himself go - must have put on a stone since left, hair always needs cutting - was never like that with me
she saw me in the flesh for first time last week & I have lost 1.5 stone since any photo she may have seen of me

thjats why I was so upset to be called such a name! done nothing to her & could quite rightly have had a go last 2 yrs but havent.

what I didnt tell u guys is I rang my ex str away to tell him calmly what had happened on phone so she couldnt feed him lies. I know he would have believed me but probably fancied keeping his balls attached & she sounds like a right fireball

Oh fantastic! Well done you

She really must be seething. You dont have a profile anymore?

dont know where its gone - did it go cos I havce a Xmas name?

my ex's gf called me a fat cow in front of my children when I was pregnant.

Made herself look a right bitch didn't she?

Your ex's gf is her own worst enemy, someone is gonna hear her sometime and be very unimpressed.

My response was to ask my ex to deal with me himself in future as she could not be civil with me. I believe it caused a big row between them. They deserved it.

Hope you're OK today.

Only one comment - you do have respect - self-respect. You handled yourself and an extremely unpleasant situation really well. Be proud.

am ok today
went to my grandpas funeral & decided not to phone as couldnt face arguement or phone put down on me

have told ex to drop kids off at my parents tomorrow (5mins from my house) as I dont deserve such disrespect.

expect he has got it in the neck since yesterday

am going to continue to be pleasant & civil to ex but dont have to see her & if she is going to be so rude, I just will make sure I dont give her any opportunity to do it again

Thought of you today and almost started a thread of my own. Rang my two to hear Granny say "it's Mummy" and Granddad very clearly in the background, "Oh, no." It was awful but actually not as bad as your situation. My ex's family have never liked me. And I think that is what shocked me about your problem - you weren't ringing her house, it was somewhere neutral and still, she kicked off.

Then, knowing you had to face a funeral. How was it? How are you? Is there anyone there with you?

Why do some people find it so hard to do the right thing around small children? Hold on in there and be an inspiration. I do think horrible things about them. I imagine telling them what I really think and then, I see the possible damage to my two and it is simply not worth it. Ah, but the price of self-restraint!

Sleep well and they will all be home soon - hurray !

sounds to me as though this is GUILT motivating her.... and that other demon jealousy

I suspect that as some of you have said, she has a lot to live upto and finds it hard.

My children arrived back at my parents soon after noon & she was with him for once.
They brought back a card with a £20 voucher for Next from his parents to me!
Then his uncle rang me New Years Eve to see how I was & to tell me what lovely children I have
His mum rang me New Years Day too to wish us a happy new year.
I felt really touched that my ex's family are all still so nice to me.

ex did not ring on New Years day
I wont have to see her now til next Xmas or possibly in the summer as she never comes up to collect the children with him.

I am just going to continue as I have done & not waste anymore time on her. Clearly she was hoping for a reaction from me & after her outburst, I realise how far I have come in the last year, and for some reason how angry she still is. What I find amazing is that even though she was the one who had the affair with my husband, and gets to play happy families with my children, SHE is the angry one not me.

he he he it's always nice to be nice