CMS advice please

[KimDeals]

Hello, I’d like to know a bit about what to expect once I submit my case to CMS.

My ex has not paid child support/maintenance in three years. Even then, he only paid it for three months and then refused. It had been a private arrangement agreed after three rounds of mediation, amongst other things agreed. When I realised he was duping it again I didn’t have the mental strength to fight fight fight this man for every inch he gives.

Then his business started to limp and eventually fold, I didn’t feel it was a good tome to go after it. He was self employed and I took legal advice, which was depressing, if I wanted to pursue his assets it was costly enough to do so in court and his money is tied up in legs of various racehorses. Again, didn’t have the mental capacity for all that grief (we were already in legal proceedings for two other things).

And here we are. He is now in full time employment and I’ve broached it. “Can you make monthly support payments now?” “I will look into it” and then radio silence.

I know him, he will “discuss”, propose future childcare arrangement changes, do anything to keep it at discussion stage than have it come to an end goal of him paying something.

This is now the principle of the thing. I earn good enough money but ANYTHING would be a welcome contribution and I’m fed up and feel exploited.

He really unnerves me and I’m delighted he is out of my life… apart from the principle of being exploited here. I think as soon as he starts stalling, again, i will go to CMS. Is that the right thing to do? But what to expect? I have no experience of it.

Even if I got 200 quid a month I would feel such satisfaction for having him held accountable.

Thanks in advance.

Why haven’t you before now? You’ve given him enough chances, I don’t claim cm personally because I don’t want to but you obviously do so claim it, I don’t know why you’ve waited so long as things don’t seem amicable anyway.

@RedCandyApple

Why haven’t you before now? You’ve given him enough chances, I don’t claim cm personally because I don’t want to but you obviously do so claim it, I don’t know why you’ve waited so long as things don’t seem amicable anyway.

Didn’t really want to get into this but as you ask, because he strung me along initially… I’ll pay next month …

Then it was obvious he wasn’t going to.

It was far from amicable.

He was self employed. Business was tanking. He was clearly struggling. Much as I despise him I felt very sorry for him in this sense. It was humiliating and he was working hard for nothing in the final year.

Then covid. He began looking for a job as a matter of urgency. I cut him some slack.

Now he is an employee and his finances are above board.

Anyone got CMS experience?

Nope. He is working now. All easy and straight forward. Phone the CMS first thing tomorrow. More information you have the better. His name. Address who he works for and NI number. They will find him on HMRC. And write to him with the offer of paying you directly.

If he decided not to pay. The arrears start to add up. And also they will then approach his employer and take the amount plus 20% more directly from his wages. You will loose 4% of the amount but that is a small price to pay.

He has had plenty of opportunity to do the right thing and had chosen not to provide for his children. Now it is out of his hands. If he asks you about a private arrangement again just tell him to discuss this with the CMS. And do not get drawn into a conversation about it

Once you have made the call it took roughly 2 months for them to approach ex for payment. Then a further 2/3 months for direct pay to be put in place. This was pretty Covid though. My ex then went self employed. But the numbers are quietly adding up and I live in hope that some day I will see some money.

Make the call tomorrow. And don't engage any further with him on the matter.

Go straight through CMS, do not do mediation and insist it's collected directly, do not inform him, let them surprise him.

Oh thank you both - this might sound mental but I feel empowered for starting to think how to tackle this - I don’t feel so overwhelmed by it.

You both suggest something a bit different though. When I contact CMS is it good - or not - to let him know? I actually don’t trust him to stick to his word. Even before he refused to set up a standing order and I had to ask, remind, ask, for whatever was due to us… was humiliating. Sorry - waffling on - should I give him the heads up or no? (I’m thinking no, I’m not sure what it can achieve).

Secondly - do they do back payment?? I had not even considered that!

He is new to payroll employee pay, second month in, so I assume he is already set up on HMRC & employer stuff now.

Thank again! Definitely feeling more capable now

Actu

No back pay. Starts from when you make the call. And don't tell him. Don't discuss it with him at all. If he brings it up which he will just deflect. And tell him to discuss it with the CMS. It is out of your hands now.

Sorry my mistake. When I said write to Him. I meant the CMS will contact him.

Aaah! Fantastic. Thank you! Thai is all really helpful

Going to phone in the morning!

Little update

Thank you all for your help. I got the ball rolling and things have moved on. I have a few q’s if you don’t mind me picking your brains some more.

I’ve been notified I am getting ~250 in total, for our two DC (neither of us have other children). They spend an average of one night a week with him. (EOW).

I know this is a % of income and dependant on how many nights the DC are with him…
He changed jobs in Dec/Jan, into a better paid job, and I am very surprised the amount is so low, so I am wondering if they are gojng off last years salary? Is it calculated in an arrears method? The documentation said it was based on his earning last year. Or something to that effect, which doesn’t make sense as we are not at the end of the tax year. Any ideas?

Secondly, the file is active since 12 Feb. Yet the first payment is not due until April! Again, is it treated in an arrears way?

Asides from all that, I am delighted I have done it. I will be 3k up p.a.

The fallout has been incredible. He is livid. Hostile, seething… I don’t care. He paid nothing for three years… Mentally it’s wonderful to get out from his grip.

I keep meaning to contact CMS and ask but have yet to do so (working… and always think of it in the afternoon after their lines shut!).

Thank you

That's great news things are in place.

The claim will be back dated to when you firstly called. Then payment calculated pro rata.

It will be based the the last full tax year. If his new job is more than 25% increase your can ask for an appeal. Otherwise it will be amended at the next annual review.

April date. Are you asking for a deduction of earnings? Or is he paying you directly. Everything takes time I'm afraid. But it will all be calculated over the year until the next review.

Don't engage with him over money. If he kicks up any fuss just ask him to take it up with CMS. And know he is making this fuss because he has lost that last bit of control over you.

Thank you @unicornsarereal72 - the numbers do suggest it is based on his v small salary - he has his own business and drew down a small salary as recommended by his tax consultant (I remember all that from when we were together). He is now an employee and I expect his salary is easily 25% more. I will bring it up with CMS and ask them to look into it. For some reason I presumed they would look at his current salary as listed with HMRC and work off that.

Yes I suppose it is moving fast (I should calm down , I just didn’t expect the drawn out dates but good to know it is all arrears based. He is hostile will all child interactions / handovers now but has never once mentioned the CMS directly (that’s his style, make life uncomfortable). The literature says we have to agree the payment date & method? Thinking about it now I’ll do that over email to avoid a conversation as it will probably spiral into something else.

If he pisses around ask to go on direct payment.

@RandomMess

If he pisses around ask to go on direct payment.

Oh definitely! If he acts up on the first payment I’m not hanging about for any more bullshit. I’ll report and request we switch.

Can somebody help? My request for the collect and pay service has been authorised through the child maintenance service. Prior to this I had been receiving a specific amount each month on the 30th. The letter I have received confirming collect and pay states that this will begin on 29th April 2022.
What happens to the money I am owed for 30th (28th) of February and 30th March. Is my child’s father expected to still pay these amounts to me directly? Or will he get away with not paying?

Thank you

Another small update

I spoke to CMS today and have put an appeal in online now. They confirmed it is based on his income last year and given he has a new job now I should put the review request in. Done! It won’t affect the due date (was afraid or would push it out more and more).

@Mummytoonexo

Can somebody help? My request for the collect and pay service has been authorised through the child maintenance service. Prior to this I had been receiving a specific amount each month on the 30th. The letter I have received confirming collect and pay states that this will begin on 29th April 2022. What happens to the money I am owed for 30th (28th) of February and 30th March. Is my child’s father expected to still pay these amounts to me directly? Or will he get away with not paying?

Thank you

Hello! I’m no exepert (hence my posts!) but having spoken to CMS today about the fact my case was “live” in early feb, yet the first payment isn’t til mid April, I asked about the back payment/gap? They said they folded it in, the CMS base payment plus any arrears spread out over the annual window. I would presume they will do the same for your arrears? Or maybe I’m totally wrong!!