So fed up

[Vickys1982xx]

I have 3 boys 19 7 and 6. My 19 year old left few years ago and hasn't had contact with me since (long story) since then my anxiety has gone bad and confidence is so low. My two younger boys are fighting all the time and don't listen I feel like I'm shouting at them all the time. I'm a single mum and my ex has absolutely no contact with them. I work part time and my mum watches them for me. Apart from me driving to and from work I don't have a break. I don't go out unless it's lunch when boys are in school. I'm not dating anyone either. I feel lonely and a bad mum sometimes.

You certainly don't sound like a bad mum to me. You just want a break the same as any other parent and there's no harm in that and ypu certainly shouldn't feel like a bad mum. Do you have any friends that could come over a night a week when the kids are in bed for a chat? Or any parents at your children's school you know where you could arrange a coffee while the kids play? Maybe a good start to speak with your gp too. I had some counselling a while back it was a 12 week one and after just talking to someone and learning some coping strategies helped me so much. I'm not normally one to open up about my feelings but that really did help and actually surprised me. Sending hugs

Thank you that's very kind. I do know a few mums that have asked me to go out. I have sometimes but also made excuses too. I had a terrible year when my youngest son was born. (My eldest causing issues my dad died I was I'll) and since then I've had very low self esteem. I did go for counselling but didn't think much of it really.