anger over deadbeat dad?

[newmuminlockdown]

hello,

My daughter is nearly 2 years old, split up with her dad a while ago, he is getting on my nerves!
he doesn't pay any child maintenance there is always an excuse however can afford to go on nights out and holidays....
he doesn't see her he texts once every month or two asking " when can I see my daughter " I tell him her schedule as I am a student nurse and also work part time so my weeks have to be planned out in advance to allow me to do this, he doesn't do any childcare I have asked him for his shifts to arrange this but he doesn't tell me then he just wants to pick and chose when he see's her, he was supposed to pick her up from nursery one day and never showed up as his girlfriends car broke down " we hadn't agree'd for his girlfriend to meet my daughter as they have only been going with each other for a couple of weeks and he hadn't seen my daughter in about 2 months " so he was doing this behind my back and the only reason I found out was because he had to tell me her car broke down that's why he never showed
he hasn't wished her a merry Christmas, send her a card or 1 gift which has really bugged me.
he is on the birth certificate but I want to cut him off completely as when my daughter gets older I don't want her wondering why she isn't good enough for her dad and why he treats her like this I think it's best he is just out of the picture all together
Some may feel this is harsh but he is a total narc

Is there a reason why you haven’t gone to cms if he doesn’t pay maintenance?

Your dd is so young. She won't notice if her dad drops out of her life now. Stop chasing him. Expect nothing.

You are showing her what an amazing mum she has got. You don't need him he any capacity.

Money through CMS. Let them do the chasing and eventually they will get a deductions of earnings directly from his employer. They will also review this annually so any pay rise etc will be included. And arrears will be incurred if he doesn't pay.

Then stop any contact with him. He is free to see his dd on x day at x time. I realise your studies make this hard. But set boundaries real helps.

You have no control over him. And who he introduces your dd too if he does see her. Just like he has no right to dictate who you introduce in your dd life. I know that sucks but pick your battles.

If he hasnt seen her for a long time and he starts making a fuss tell him you want him to see her in a contact centre to build up. Relationship with her. And he needs to seek advice to set this up.