Feel really down

[Kihanxxxx]

My daughter is 9 months and when me and her dad fall out he acts like we both don't exist. I broke up with him because I caught him lying and cheating again. and I haven't heard from him for 2 whole weeks. I don't know how anyone can go a day without wanting to see or check up on their own child. He's too busy going out all the time living his life and doing god knows what. But he doesn't ring or call me EVER not even about our child. I feel so sorry for my daughter my heart feels broken and I feel so alone. He acts like she doesn't exist like he doesn't even have a daughter and like she has no dad :( I'm sick of being the one reaching out and letting go of my pride. So I haven't contacted him but I feel like my daughter needs to see her dad

We live two hours away from each other and he hasn't asked to see her or even spoke to me. Hasn't seen her in three weeks

He's checked out of the relationship which is over. Stop hoping he'll be back, and stop chasing him.
You need to build your life, just you and your daughter. Do you have family support? Make sure you put in a claim to the CMSand then move on. Leave organising any contact with your dd to him. It doesn't sound like he'll bother. To be honest your dd will be better off without him. Sorry to be so blunt.

I'm not chasing him I'm the one who ended it. I just think it's not fair on my daughter for him to be in an out all the time

I don't know how to claim and I heard that there's no point as it's barely anything

I agree about not chasing him. I don't mean that you are chasing him in the hope of getting back together with him (although honestly you don't seem to have fully understood that the relationship is over).

But you can't chase him on your daughter's behalf either. Claim child support, focus on being a good parent yourself, and if he shows a commitment to parenting his child obviously you won't stand in the way of that. But he is not going to be calling you for cosy chats about her, and it is not your job to make him see her.

There's a calculator online for CMS, based on the other parent earning £20,000 you are entitled to around £200 and would be more if they earn more, so it would definitely be worth doing. It's going to be a long 18 years or more of you're always trying to get him to be involved when he's not that interested, like the others have said I'd just concentrate on building your own life and being there for your daughter. At least you're not worrying about him wanting 50/50 custody or anything like that?

@JellyOnAPlatewithicecream he's only aloud supervised contact so could never get custody. And also he's on universal credit he doesn't work so I probably would get barely nothing

It's always worth putting in the cms claim. If he gets a job of any kind in the future, it may help you when you need it most. Think of it as your daughter's money you are custodian of. Likewise if he wins the lottery etc.
This is a man who can't be bothered and presumably has some kind of drink/drug/violent past if needs to be supervised. Don't set your poor dd up for a life of hoping he'll show up for birthdays when he never will. Better to assemble some things about her dad, a photo, some bits and pieces from his mum maybe, and put them away in a box for when she is older and asks. Good luck.

If he’s on UC it would only be £7. I agree with the others stop chasing him, it’s only been 3 weeks so although it’s bad I would just get on with things without him, my ex last seen our kids in January!