Child wants to live with the other parent

[gardenbeachsand]

Hello, just after advice if anyone have been through the same thing?
My children are with their dad at the moment, and ive received a call from my ex to say totally out of the blue my 14 year old has told him that he wants to live with him.
Ex has told ds that if that happens he will need to move schools as ex wont take him.

Ex has said as they are coming home in a few days i need to talk to DS and let him know that if i let DS go it will be at least till hes 16 because of the last two years off school.

I have looked online and its says a child cant make a decision where to live until they are 16.

For many reasons, i dont want to go into now, but i dont think its in DS best interest to go and live with his dad, i cant discuss things with ex on my own and would rather have help. But who can help?
If Ex does decide to take me to court and we go mediation would i bring ds along too?

Do you think ex has influenced or pressured DS to this decision?

Also, most courts will take the opinion and desires of a child of 14 into account...it's not cut and dried that they don't get a choice. I think DS would be present in court but could be wrong.

I do think there could be a influence going on.

I just want to go through the proper channels.

If you force a 14 Yr old to live with you it would be a huge mistake imo. You will set yourself up as the bad guy at an age when many teenagers don't need an excuse. I'd just be calm, listen, explore reasons, tell him you are really sad and will miss him but respect his decision whilst outlining the impact (moving from school, friends, clubs etc)

He's reasonable to say that a move in school would be necessary and it would have to be 2 years because of GCSEs.

Have you spoken to your son?