Co-parenting

[parentoftwogirls]

Hi, I need some advice.

I split from my children's dad about 3 years ago. He's got depression and can't work. His parents moved into his house because he couldn't afford the bills or look after our children on his own.

He lives about a 40 minute drive or an hours bus journey away.

He has our 3 and 5 year old every weekend, however it's been a bit longer during the school holidays.

He doesn't bother with them much when they go to his house as they are with his parents.

They sleep downstairs with his parents on a sofa bed as it's a 2 bedroom house with 4 adults living there.

When they return home from being there, they don't sleep very well for the first few days and then I get them back into routine and then they go back over and it's a never ending cycle.

My 5 nearly 6 year old has said she doesn't like staying over for so long and has been very upset. Their dad however, complains when he doesn't get them as much.

I'm unsure on what advice I'm looking for, but is there anyone else in a similar situation? Or have any guidance? I'm unsure on how to approach the situation.

Do you work at weekends? Many dads have every other weekend so that kids can have quality time with mum and her side of the family not to mention attend parties etc You wouldn't be unreasonable to take half of the weekends back imo

Who sleeps in the second bedroom if the grandparents sleep with the kids in the sofa bed ? Do you think that the sleeping issues are from co-sleeping or the bed?

Do you get on with your ex ILs? Would they be willing to rejig the sleeping arrangements ?

Do you mean the second bedroom is downstairs?

Would one over night a week work better. One weekend Friday from school til sat tea time. Following week Saturday am until Sunday teatime?

@AllTheSingleLadiess

Do you work at weekends? Many dads have every other weekend so that kids can have quality time with mum and her side of the family not to mention attend parties etc You wouldn't be unreasonable to take half of the weekends back imo

Who sleeps in the second bedroom if the grandparents sleep with the kids in the sofa bed ? Do you think that the sleeping issues are from co-sleeping or the bed?

Do you get on with your ex ILs? Would they be willing to rejig the sleeping arrangements ?

Yes, im working weekends at the moment. There is 2 bedrooms and a sofa bed downstairs. The kids dad is living with his parents and brother, so his brother has the room that my children used to sleep in. I always get argued with if I ask for the children for one weekend a month, it's so much hassle. I just don't know what to do really.