Child Maintenance - Shared Care

[IIISILVERFOXIII]

Hi All,

I hope you are all well! First time post!

Need a bit of advice on child maintenance if that's ok?

I used to have my little girl 1 night one week and 2 nights the next.

That was until Feb when she lived with me for 65 nights full time/ 7 days per week from Feb to April as her mum was going through some personal issues.

She moved back to her mums in April and we have agreed she will stay with me 3 nights per week from now on.

I also have her for 21 nights in summer holidays and Christmas so approximately 205 out of 365 nights.

I have been told now though that I will have to pay £42 per week child maintenance for her? How is this possible?

In terms of shared care/ responsibilities I do school runs/ doctors (if she's with me) as she stays with me Thursday after school until Sunday early evening. I also buy her clothes, pay for her hair and take her on holidays along with all of the other things I'm supposed to do.

I just get told my child maintenance services it's because her mum receives the child benefit?

Any advice would be appreciated

@muchtoocold ah ok, learn something every day

To be honest OP, you must earn more than £60,000 pa if you won't qualify for child benefit, so quibbling about £42 a week for your DD, when you do 163 nights and your ex does 202 seems a bit....well, mean.

You could challenge the CMS at appeal but the time and any legal resource will cost you more than that. And you might lose, so no benefit.

And at 13 I'm sure your dd can tell her mum what she would like for tea.

@IIISILVERFOXIII

For clarity it's 3 nights with me. I pick her up from school Thursday and she goes back to her mum Sunday afternoon.

Unfortunately my ex is far from reasonable, she would rather get Botox and fillers and give my daughter a £1 rustlers burger for tea.

I've sought legal advice and they say if the care and responsibilities are shared (school runs, doctors etc), neither parent should pay each other regardless of who earns more or who receives child benefit.

That's where I'm confused and CMS keep repeating it's because her mum claims the child benefit?

Urgh - the Botox and fillers comment - this is where you lost my sympathy. I have seen this time of crap too many times - are you accusing your ex of neglect? Do you have proof? Or are you just popping a little character assassination in there because she’s not here to defend herself?

Not looking for sympathy, was looking for advice if anyone else has experienced similar.

I wouldn't slander or "character assassinate" anyone without concrete evidence.

Appreciate your comments thought thanks

Have you looked at the figures about the reality of the number of nights you have dc?

How does speculating on your ex’s spending habits constitute asking for advice? Your question is simply about the amount of CMS you may have to pay, and little digs about her care of herself over your daughter do not help you with your query.

Classic high earner not wanting to pay

It’s probably because the number of nights you have your Dd over the hols doesn’t tip you into a different band - it’s not worked out on an exact percentage of time spent, it’s whether the number of nights is ‘up to’ 2 per week, ‘up to’ 3 per week or whatever.

I can understand why you feel aggrieved at her getting CB +£2k per year from you (esp when you’ve had DD a majority of this year) but it sounds like ex has more working days affected so may earn less as a result?

So you’re a high earner and begrudging £2k a year towards your DD. Like bollocks do you not know how much your ex earns. I guarantee it’s less than you do. You’d rather stick to to her than suck up 40 quid a week to help her care for the child you created together?

This post all seems a little one sided. I imagine if this was a mother asking the same question as a high earner but was saying the dad went to pub and got tattoos constantly and fed the teenager micro meals there would be uproar.

There is a guy here who by what he had said does pretty much 50/50 care for his daughter, yes 3 nights on paper but if she stays until Sunday afternoon it’s actually 3.5 days which equates 50/50 (I am aware cms looks at nights, but in reality it’s exactly 50/50)

Does lots of the other stuff required of a parent and provides everything. IMO no maintainence in this situation should be ‘due’. If the ex wants her DD to live the same standard of life with her as she does with her dad, she is welcome to provide that herself for the 50% she is there. It the dad ‘chooses’ to give money to help, also fine, but I don’t agree it should be ‘due’ to even the playing field if the kid is with him for 50% of the time.

My ex has a 4 bed house, I have 3, he goes on lots of foreign holidays him and his partner, we don’t. We have the kids more and he pays the minimum maintance for that. But if he had them 50/50 and did all the stuff this dad says he does (school, gp, general kid admin) I wouldn’t expect him to pay me to allow the kids to have a 4 bed here, if we want a 4 bed we will have to work for and get it ourselves.