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Original poster

Don't know what to say

49 replies

esselllx · 12/01/2021 20:55

My boyfriend just blocked me I'm fed up of him blocking me all of the time. He doesn't care about me like I care about him. The relationship is one sided. It hurts me so much I'm so fed up.
We just had a daughter. He was supposed to come back today but didn't.
I don't know what to say to him

OP posts:
Clymene · 12/01/2021 20:55

You will be hearing from the CMS on Monday.

AHippoNamedBooBooButt · 12/01/2021 20:57

I would state how much you would like to receive in child support and your exact terms that he is allowed contact with your dd. If you have any of his belongings in your home I would also make it clear when these will be bagged up and left outside the house for him to collect.
I’ve been there, it’s shit, but I promise you it does get easier and in a few months you’ll be wondering why you ever bothered trying to make it work. Hug your baby tightly. Do it for her.
You are strong and you can do this Flowers

Ohalrightthen · 12/01/2021 20:58

Don't say anything. Change the locks, file for CMS and enjoy life without this miserable excuse for a man.

Tangledtresses · 12/01/2021 21:03

Don't say anything
Block him and get on with your life...
he's a loser

Chel098 · 12/01/2021 21:05

@Clymene

You will be hearing from the CMS on Monday.
I agree.
Original poster
esselllx · 12/01/2021 21:05

Can I still do that if He's not on the birth certificate????? He didn't come with me because we had an argument

OP posts:
Chel098 · 12/01/2021 21:06

How old is your DD? How long have you been together OP. If you know he doesn’t care you already know what to do.

Original poster
esselllx · 12/01/2021 21:15

@Clymene she's 6 weeks old and we've been together 6 years.
I'm 20 he's 24

OP posts:
MoodyMarshall · 12/01/2021 21:16

So he was 18 and you were 14?

He's an abuser. Please block him. Would you want your daughter to be going out with an 18 year old in fourteen years' time? Thanks

Chel098 · 12/01/2021 21:25

Does he not actually live with you OP normally? What’s your support network like?

cracracatlady · 12/01/2021 21:26

As above 🤮

Original poster
esselllx · 12/01/2021 21:28

@Chel098 he lives 2 hours away I used to live there aswell but my mums moved us about all over the place so not in that area anymore but we stayed together, he has been basically living here but has been home for two weeks as we've fallen out again. Everything was fine but then today we started arguing Tonight He's blocked me on everything. And ignoring my calls turned off his phone but not his wife so I iMessaged him. He just blocked me on that too. It breaks my heart when he does this it makes me so upset

I feel like my worlds just falling apart

OP posts:
Original poster
esselllx · 12/01/2021 21:29

Anyone who wants to judge can get of my thread

@MoodyMarshall
@cracracatlady

OP posts:
timetest · 12/01/2021 21:30

You can claim CMS from him even though he’s not on the birth certificate. Put in a claim immediately. Anyone who can treat the mother of their child in such a callous way isn’t worth having.

Chel098 · 12/01/2021 21:33

He doesn’t sound very nice OP. Have you got any friends your in touch with?

You need to focus on your baby and yourself.

You was way too young for an 18 year old to be dating. What do both of your families think of it? Do you realise it’s not right?

Chel098 · 12/01/2021 21:35

@esselllx

Anyone who wants to judge can get of my thread *@MoodyMarshall* *@cracracatlady*
I don’t think they were judging. As you were young he’s probably manipulative and posters are concerned for you and the age gap.
JiltedJohnsJulie · 12/01/2021 21:37

You definitely need to change the locks OP. You don't want him turning up in your home when he fancies.

Do make a claim for maintenance and if he asks to see DD message back saying that you would be only to happy for him to see her but you want him to apply through the Court.

I wouldn't block him. Personally I'd want to tell my DD that I was more than happy to let him see her. I would keep any abusive it insulting messages or texts though.

I know it's hard, especially with such a young baby and in lockdown but it sounds like this relationship is over OP. Time to start planning your new life with your lovely new DD Thanks

Original poster
esselllx · 12/01/2021 21:44

@timetest the thing is he won't come and see her 😭 only if we are on good terms he'll want to be around. So it's like I have to be mug and allow him to do what he wants for the sake of my daughter so she can be around her dad.

I caused the argument today because I know that he's messaging other girls so I got upset and started an argument. But he just blocked me instead of speaking to me about it.

OP posts:
Original poster
esselllx · 12/01/2021 21:45

I meant to tag @JiltedJohnsJulie :( pp

OP posts:
timetest · 12/01/2021 21:46

You did not cause the argument. He did by speaking to other girls. Think hard, does he bring anything positive to your and your babies life?

katieg03 · 12/01/2021 21:49

If this was your daughter telling you this what advice would you give her?

You need to keep the both of you safe, physically and mentally.

Apply to CMS. Don't threaten to, just do it. Get your financial affairs in order. Can you arrange contact through another person? If it's that toxic, you need to protect yourself and stop giving him opportunities to give you a hard time.

JiltedJohnsJulie · 12/01/2021 21:49

the thing is he won't come and see her 😭 only if we are on good terms he'll want to be around. So it's like I have to be mug and allow him to do what he wants for the sake of my daughter so she can be around her dad.

Yo don't have to let him be emotionally abusive towards you though.

I wouldn't contact him again, I know that may be hard. If he's talking to other women and has left you, you need to accept that he's already checked out of this relationship.

Change the locks, file for CMS and talk to your friends. You're worth so much more than the treatment he's giving you.

You're 20, what do you want fir you and your DD?

Starlightstarbright1 · 12/01/2021 21:51

The more the read the more i am concerned.

You did not startvthe argument.. He did messagingbthe other girls.

If he isn't interested in seeingbyour Dd because she is this amazing precious life hecwants to be part of her life key him... it isn't up to you to put up with shit to facilitate contact.

You do not need him on bc to claim cms...

Original poster
esselllx · 12/01/2021 21:51

@timetest well when he's here he does help out a lot with the baby and they bond a lot and things are good between us.
It's just the arguments, the lies and the way he's so emotionless with me
My hearts really hurting right now

OP posts:
Original poster
esselllx · 12/01/2021 21:53

@JiltedJohnsJulie I have no friends :( no one to talk to

OP posts:
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