Hi,
would really appreciate some advice.
I have court tomorrow, My LG is nearly 2 and my ex hasnt seen her since Feb. Prior to that I was trying everything to set up a stable and consistent routine where they could build a bond but he kept showing up late, agreeing to dates and then cancelling or making other plans; seeing friends, going shopping, lads drinking weekends. Throughout our relationship he was controlling and the relationship ended when I was 7 months pregnant as he cheated on me with multiple women. Since the split he has hardly seen our daughter, sometimes months at a time. I have had to chase for child maintenance etc. Anyways, since fab he hasnt seen her or asked about her, any contact agreement i have tried to put in place via the solicitors he has had an issue with and no arrangement has been made, he made threats of putting a brick through my window & revenge porn threats, i have rang the police twice for harassment as he would not stop contacting me with (not regarding my daughter) i have had to block him off all media and contact only via solicitors . He is now taking me to court. I have never stopped contact or said he cannot see our daughter. He expressed to me last year he thought he was becoming an alcoholic. He has another child with his ex and he hardly sees him either. Issues have been raised at to his position with alcohol and he has denied everything. saying he has a fantastic relationship with his son and the mother and regular contact. My solicitor has asked if i want to request the courts to carry out a fact finding hearing. I have majority of text message (revenge porn, harassing behaviour etc) and the mother of his son is willing to tell the courts how he is with his son. Including pulling him by his arms when he was younger to 'make him stronger' and dislocating his arm, controlling behaviour throughout their relationship and the lack of contact with hi son and impact etc. He also picked up his son for a weekend, took him to a girls house he met on tinder, put him in a room to sleep and said he would be back, his son didnt see him until morning whilst he stayed up drinking etc with the girl. His son went home distraught having not washed or brushed his teeth for 3 days and staying in strange surroundings.
My Ex said he will see her every other weekend for up to 3 months (3hrs at a time) and then wants her overnight only once a month at his house which is 3hrs away! she goes to nursery on a friday and this will be 6-8hrs travel on a weekend for the sake of once a month. she doesnt know who he is, he hasnt even put her in a car seat and its absolutely breaking my heart. I have no issue with him having contact if it is safe, consistent and in her best interest but he is only willing to accept what he wants and not what is best for her.
He now has a new partner so i imagine that he has told everyone i am stopping him seeing her and now questions are beig asked.. hence court?
Has anybody been through a fact finding hearing and what would you recommend? initial hearing and also contact centres. My little girl isnt even 2!
PLEASE PLEASE give me something x