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Lone parents

Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

If you're a lone parent and managed to buy a house on your own..

30 replies

Pebbledashery · 26/10/2020 22:59

How did you do it?
I've been renting for a short while now and want some future security for my LO and me. I've recently gone back to work full time and my salary is now FTE.
How did you single parents manage to get a mortgage and deposit together?

OP posts:
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notdawn · 26/10/2020 23:01

What’s your salary and what part of the country are you in?

PollyPelargonium52 · 27/10/2020 18:11

I already owned my own home. I do think having a child late in life gave me time to sort that out.

DustyLoafer · 27/10/2020 18:46

House prices were a lot lower when I bought mine years ago. I could comfortably pay my mortgage on one average salary.

Justmemyselfandi999 · 27/10/2020 20:12

Shared ownership

Pebbledashery · 27/10/2020 20:26

I've just gone back to work full time and my salary is 38,000. Little one turns 3 next year so will get her funded hours so hopefully that helps a bit.. My biggest expense is childcare.. Its nearly 900 a month! I'm in the South East.

OP posts:
Mollyboom · 27/10/2020 20:28

See if you could start with a shared equity house- they are a good way to get on the housing ladder. Some local authorities offer them as do some housing developers/

Thankssomuch · 27/10/2020 20:33

My ex and I split the profit from the sale of the house we had together, half each, it meant I had just enough to buy a one bedroomed place ( my little DS and I shared a room for years) but only due to the fact that the sellers came down to meet me price-wise (I am eternally grateful). I could pay the monthly repayments from my salary. It was one of the best moves I’ve made ever. That was in 1999, the market will be different now but that was my experience. That house was tiny, one bedroomed, no garden, no parking space, but it was mine.

Pebbledashery · 27/10/2020 21:23

@Thankssomuch I love that. Did you sell it and find somewhere bigger? I live in a lovely two bed house that's absolutely perfect, my landlord is lovely and this is a buy to let property and he wants a long term tenant. The house is valued at 220k which I'm not sure I could buy a house in the region of without a substantial deposit.. I'd buy a 1 bed and share if it meant it was mine xx

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Murrfect · 27/10/2020 21:36

I had enough for a deposit and then moved into the area I wanted just before school started.

The childcare costs came right down so I overpaid my mortgage when I could and paid it off a few years ago.

I earnt about the same as you and found the expensive times were preschool about 12/13 years old then 6th form college with the bits in between less so when I could overpay (he’s now at uni n doesn’t need any top ups although it’s there if he needs it)

I only had a two bed workers cottage worth about £210k and my sons friends definitely thought we were poor but now I have a mortgage free property which I rent out, a decently paid job n savings instead of the big mortgage

It’s possible :) good luck!

toiletpaper · 27/10/2020 21:40

I'm a single mother renting. I hope to buy my own house in about five years time, I work full time but have a lot of debt so I'm hoping to save like mad when that's paid off.

OP out of interest how much rent do you pay on a £220k house? I pay £500 pm on a house valued at 130k ish but I live in one or the cheapest areas in wales and it's a nice 3 bedroom house with a driveway and small garden thankfully.

Pebbledashery · 27/10/2020 21:43

Hi @toiletpaper I live in a spacious 2 bed.. I pay £800 a month for it. The only downside of the property is the bathroom is next to one of the bedrooms so it's like an ensuite... so I had to give my LO the master bedroom and I took the smaller room.. But i figured as it's only us living here it didn't matter. I would love to buy the house I'm renting now.

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Pebbledashery · 27/10/2020 21:46

@murrfect aspire to be where you are now that's bloody amazing. I'm not bad with money but looking after a child financially on my own is tough. Her waste of space father doesn't pay a penny towards her. I'm owed nearly 4k in child maintenance 🙄.. The only debt I have at the moment is furniture for my house I got on 0% over a year so that'll be paid off by March. Its childcare that bleeds me dry 😭😭😭

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Thankssomuch · 27/10/2020 21:55

pebbledashery I don’t know that much about Buy-to-Let but I do know that a single friend of mine found it very helpful in helping her get on to the ladder.
I also had nursery fees to cover but they don’t last for ever and one day you’ll be free of them, not that you want to wish your DCs’ lives away. After many years I met someone and married him, and my DS and I moved in to his nice big house - that was in 2007 and I’m still there now. I kept my little place and have rented it out for years. I’m also in the South East and it’s flipping expensive here though - I do empathise with you.

tigerbear · 27/10/2020 21:58

When exDH and I split up, we were lucky enough to own two places. One we rented out, and one we lived in.
Thank god we had the rental to then sell (and had a lot of equity in), otherwise I’d have found it impossible to buy alone.
Ex kept the house we were already living in, and I bought a new build with the proceeds.
I wasn’t working fulltime when I made the offer, so had to find a job fast.
Good luck OP.

tigerbear · 27/10/2020 22:00

@Pebbledashery that’s shocking that your ex doesn’t pay any maintenance! Why is that, May I ask? That’s your problem right there.
Surely if he was contributing to costs, childcare etc, you could perhaps save for a deposit?

Thankssomuch · 27/10/2020 22:05

tigerbear it’s easier said than done, getting money out of an ex - mine always said that if I tried, he’d just stop working (he would have done).

Pebbledashery · 27/10/2020 22:07

Basically in a nutshell he's a b*stard...He earns over 75k a year. He's supposed to pay £650 a month calculated by CMS towards his child but he's refusing to because he'd rather be forced to than put any feelings of animosity aside than pay a penny to me towards his daughter. The problem he has is he cannot bear to send me the money. Daughter and I fled severe domestic violence and he's not seen her for 5 months he's initiated court proceedings once he received the letter from CMS! This is my punishment it seems for daring to leave him. That's a whole other thread though. But yes, his contribution towards our daughter would help me save my money towards a deposit but he'd rather make my life a misery financially than be any kind of decent father.

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tigerbear · 27/10/2020 22:09

Wow, some men really are total bastards! Sorry you’re having to deal with that, and well done on leaving him, that must have been really scary.

Pebbledashery · 27/10/2020 22:12

Nasty piece of work isn't even strong enough to describe him. Thank you it's been really tough but determined to give my daughter the best life I possibly can.. I hope the funded hours she'll get will make a substantial difference in the long run but I've seen threads on here about how nurseries make up the loss in fees by charging for food and nappies etc. Why is life so expensive 😂

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Weesweetiewife · 27/10/2020 22:17

You should qualify for some sort of help toward childcare costs. Check it out on line

Pebbledashery · 27/10/2020 22:19

I will when my daughter turns 3. I don't earn below the threshold for the 2 year old funded hours. Since I've gone back full time and now get a full time salary I've basically lost 80%, of my universal credit entitlement also. I'm basically only slightly better off than I was working part time.

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Thankssomuch · 27/10/2020 22:34

You may be only slightly better off now but that will change. Play the long game - you will not regret it, it will be worth it - not only financially but on every level.

trinibrit · 27/10/2020 23:07

When I stopped paying childcare I put that same amount aside to build up the deposit. I never raised my standard of living until the house was bought.

Pebbledashery · 27/10/2020 23:38

@trinibrit that's EXACTLY what I want to do. When my little one doesn't need full time childcare. I'd be saving just shy of 1k a month!

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dancingqueen345 · 27/10/2020 23:50

It sounds like once you're not paying full time childcare you'll be in a great position!

What sort of house value are you looking at?

I pay £480 a month on a mortgage of £132k (I put down £15k deposit), which obviously a good chunk less than you are already affording in rent.