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Tips on moving on from baby daddy!

5 replies

Babymama2020 · 22/10/2020 19:25

Hey!! 👋
So my little boys daddy left us when he was 7 weeks old. We had just bought a house, and was due to move in.
It was a tough time as lockdown made me feel very alone, and then I was diagnosed with PND. He didn’t understand how I was feeling or when I said “I just want you to come home after work instead of the pub I need you” he saw this as controlling and ended the relationship moving back to his mums.
It has been 12 weeks, and although I can feel it getting slightly easier it’s still really tough. I’m fine when I don’t see him, but as soon as I see him and he leaves it’s like I’m back to square one.
He doesn’t see baby boy very much as started a new job, works 6pm-2am then stays awake till 6/7 and sleeps all day until work again.
I am literally doing it all on my own for our boy.
I resent him, and he sent a text to me the other day by accident which wasn’t meant for me, so now I can’t shake off the feeling he is speaking to other girls.
I am trying my hardest to not show I am bothered, and I’m not sure how to continue this

Does it get any easier.....?

I am currently looking for somewhere for me and my lil one to live and feel this will be a good think for us both. But for some reason I can’t seem to shake off the feelings I have for his dad.

I don’t really know what I’m looking for here by writing this, maybe just to vent or see if anyone has been in any similar situations.

How often do you think he should be seeing his son?

He doesn’t work Friday or Saturdays.
Our little boy is 19 weeks and I don’t want to let him sleep over yet.. when his dad has had him for a few hours he rings me when he cries. It’s like he can’t handle it.

OP posts:
carly2803 · 22/10/2020 20:41

tips for moving on? stop chasing his dad.

he calls you when he cries, in the kindest way - just get on with it yourself

spoken from a single mum! bloody hard but you know where you are at doing it alone
best of luck

nimbuscloud · 22/10/2020 20:46

Can you not stay in the house you have just bought?
How are you doing financially?

Babymama2020 · 22/10/2020 20:52

Just as we was about to move in he pulled out, I couldn’t get the house on my own so it fell through. I’m living with my parents in a bungalow at the minute 🤦🏻‍♀️

I went to get my eyelashes done the other week as a pick me up, he had our little boy for one hour. He phoned me saying he was crying, so I said he is tired and make him some milk if he is unsettled. He hurled abuse at me down the phone swearing and saying I care more about my appearance than our son. Makes me feel like a bad mum. This was the first hour to myself in absolute weeks!!

OP posts:
unicornsarereal72 · 23/10/2020 08:13

Engage with him about things that you have too. If he shouts down the phone at you hang up.

It is great that you are with family I am sure they want to help. Let them support you.

Stop chasing your ex. If he wants to see the baby you meet somewhere and stay for an hour. Your baby is only tiny.

It's hard to let go when you werent the one to end the relationship and it isn't what you want. Focus on you. And your little boy. Distract yourself if he comes into your thoughts. In time it get easier.

ruthet · 23/10/2020 15:45

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