Moving away - is it possible when there is a court order?

[bishandyarb]

Evening everyone.

I'm a single Mum and live alone with my dc's (dd1 15 & dd 2 9). DD's have different Dad's. DD2's Dad and I have a child arrangements order for shared care which states he has her Sundays to Tuesdays every week and half the holidays.

I live 400 miles away from my family, and have done for 20 years. The last couple of years though I've increasingly been feeling isolated where I live and cut off from my family. It's been real struggle going it alone, particularly as dd2's Dad is a nasty narcissistic character whom I live in fear of. My parents are getting older and increasingly I worry about them driving here and over the years to come that will be more so and I worry if something should happen I want to be closer and also to have the support and love of my family close by. And then COVID has come along and magnified all this. And it has led to me really wanting to go home.

What I need to know is, will the court let me take dd? There's no way on earth I would go without her. Would it be better for me to move say half way so that contact would be easier and seeing them would be easier? Would the court even entertain the idea? I know he would fight me tooth and nail and try to get full custody of dd himself. He is constantly trying to make me out to be a bad parent.

I'm really keen to hear anyone's experiences of this please or knowledge of how this might work, general advice.

Many thanks in advance

You’d need to explain how the move would be in the child’s best interests, not your parents. Moving even 200 miles is a huge step, and would make your shared care arrangement impossible.

@DelilahDingleberry Yes it would I know. I just feel so trapped here and want to be with my family. I feel it would be in dd's interest to see her gp's more. She doesn't want to go to her Dad's anymore, she's been reluctant for the last year, so much so that I got some legal advice as I felt awful having to force her to go but I was told unless I had proof of abuse I had to make her.

You need to think how you would feel if your Ex moved your child away 400miles away. Have you spoken to your DD as it would mean she wouldn’t see her father except in the school holidays. The court might let her make the decision.

How old is your DD? If she's a teen, she's old enough to have a say. You may be able to, but one option is to give your ex all the holidays. How would you feel about that?