Resigned to being single until covid passes (so a very long time)

[Tiredtiredtired100]

Are any other lone parents feeling that covid means they have absolutely no chance of meting anyone?

I’ve been a lone parent since I was 10 weeks pregnant and pre-covid had just got to the point where I felt ready to date again. Really, I just want to go out and have a nice time, I don’t know how serious I want things to be but I just want some non-mum time (my friends live a long way away or are mums and never really go out anyway).

Well, along comes covid and I can’t get a babysitter and can’t ask my parents to watch my DS either. I’m a key worker, so don’t want to put my parents at risk (especially as my mum is vulnerable) and so I am not seeing them at all at present. I think not seeing my parents has made me incredibly lonely all of a sudden and the thought that this is it now and that I can’t date and can’t see them so am resigned to potentially years at home on my own every evening is really getting me down.

I know much worse things have happened as a result of covid, of course, but is anyone else resigned themselves to being single (And not even dating casually) for years on end if this pandemic continues for that long?

I had to laugh at this not in a horrible way just because this is my life all the time, 4 kids, no support so I’ve accepted I will be single forever Covid or no Covid

That sounds really hard for you. I'm alone with 3 DCs and far too busy to think about bringing in another person, and daresay the pp with 4 is too - but would probably feel very different if I were younger with a small baby. It can be an isolating time even with a partner and without a pandemic, you are a trooper!

1. It won't be years. For better or worse people will choose to take more risks as time goes on. This winter will probably be a bit rubbish though
2. You mention feelings of loneliness, are there ways you can address this with your existing circle of friends and family, or at work? Have you got single mum friends to talk to? If not, have you looked at local mums groups, or Gingerbread? I actually spent time recently writing down a list of old friends and cousins that I wanted to be close to but hadn't called in a long time, and sent them messages or called and it has rekindled some lovely friendships (could be good for old.flames too!)
3. I have no advice on dating as it's way out of my current orbit but am sure someone will be along with better advice...

Thanks @Givemeabreak88 and @OverTheRubicon for replying.

@Givemeabreak88 I really do feel for you and a year ago I felt the same and couldn’t have cared less.

@OverTheRubicon thanks for the advice, gingerbread have no groups near me but I have joined a local single parents group and made one other local(ish) mom friend. I think lockdown just made me really lonely and I wish I had close friends nearby but they’re all in London or all over the world, so even without covid I’d rarely see them. Seeing my family filled that void but I work in a school and they’re all too vulnerable to visit so I just don’t see how I’m going to be able to visit them until next summer unless covid goes away before then.

Thanks for replying, but I think the answer is probably to suck it up and do my best until we get through this, like everyone else is having to right now.

You are definitely not the only one feeling this way!! I am getting too good at making a list of all the reasons I'll stay single forever (only seem to attract toxic people, I'm super over weight, I'm gay, so much smaller dating pool, and really picky, no one likes me) - its getting longer and longer and I feel miserable.

I'm so sorry op, this all sounds so hard. Several times over the past months I've thought about single women in their 30's who want marriage and children, yet how in the hell can they possibly find a relationship with this covid nightmare? There are undoubtedly many, many frustrated and lonely people out there.