Heartbroken.

[november90]

I just need someone to talk to.
My ex husband walked out on me at 24 weeks pregnant. We share a 3 year old and now 13 weeks old. He has the 3 year old 2 nights a week, he shows little interest in the baby and claims it's due to him being breast fed.
He's been so emotionally abusive towards me since we split... constantly threatening to take the children away from me.
He's just accepted a new job and is receiving a pay rise but said if I want any more money I'll back him into a corner and take the boys off me and have 50/50 custody.
I feel like I'm living a life on egg shells of his threats. I feel like I'm about to go into major panic anxiety mode. He's shown no interest in our youngest and expects to be able to just take him!
I feel so low. How do I pick myself up? I could cry for weeks on end :(

I don’t know what to say to you and you must be desperately unhappy and alone, have you tried women’s aid or samaritans just to find out where you stand, I’m sure your ex can’t take your children away from you and it seems that he’s financially and emotionally abusive, there must be someone out there that can help you, have you no family or friends, this is so sad.

flowers for you OP, trying to settle my little ones but didn't want to read and run, so I shall message tomorrow x

I feel like I'm going to live a life on egg shells where he will constantly threaten to rake them away when he is unhappy.
I've looked into custody and he's automatically entitled to 50/50 as he has PR.
He's a horrible, manipulative, emotionally and financially abusive man!

No he’s not entitled to 50/50
If you speak to someone (maybe ss) and tell them how he is with you exactly
Then he will not be given 50/50

Also I reckon he’s just saying that to frighten you and to stop you asking for money
You need to stop being frightened by him, stand upto him for you & your children sake
He’s a bully.
If you don’t he will walk all over you, and know what a soft touch you are
He will do it again and again

Do it for your kids

I've posed on here quite a lot and I've been told that as were married he automatically gets PR and if we went to court he would get 50/50 regardless of how he treats me.
I'm just sick of his threats and his abuse. I feel like I'm going to spend the rest of my life being tormented by him!

Hi

I’m so sorry to hear you are going through this, if it makes you feel better I was married and went through the courts and my x does not have 50/50 care, he was working full time and the little one would not have settled well into that arrangement.

The money aspect is separate and you should use the cms calculator if you know a ballpark figure of his earnings.

Horrible people like that will bully you to a corner the only thing I can suggest is to keep the peace but don’t concede favours, if he doesn’t want to be involved it’s probably the best to keep a record of that.