Ex shows his true colours at last, but now what?

[Whatshouldmynamebe321]

So ...ex is a narcissist manipulator we split 6 years ago. Have 50 50 custody and usually he demands every per cent of that. Fathers day fell on my day but I told him I didnt mind if he wanted to see them via text, he ignored me. Apparently he told the children he would be devastated not seeing them on fathers day, so traumatised in fact, that he wouldnt even be able to ring them because it would hurt too much. They ignored him. But dutifully yesterday morning they sent him a fathers day text and had previously given him a card and gift.
Today he was due to collect them. He didnt. Then sent message to say he couldnt. Then rang them and told them he was so angry that they didnt call him yesterday. So angry that he is now sick of doing anything for them, he needs a week away not talking to them.
My youngest sent him a text following this which he has ignored. She checked her phone all evening waiting for a reply which never came...I could see her heart broken and couldnt help her.
The older 2 are shocked and I think quite angry that he is blaming them. They are very nervous that its going to be hell when they do next see him because he goes on and on and on about his issues and how the world owes him.
There is no solution. I cannot help here. If I get involved he will be mad at them for telling me.
I just have to wait and see what happens.
No child should have to suffer the anxt and guilt!

I feel so sad for them and I really truly hate him.

How old are they?

It is bloody hard for them and you to watch, let them throw it all at you if you're able to withstand it. It will help them to know they have a safe 'Rock' parent that is unphased by the stormy dickhead parent.
Avoid slagging him off (gonna get slaughtered for this) UNLESS they seem to want to slag him off.
I DID want to slag off my shit parent (Mum) to my dad and he used to 'correct' me by telling me how much she loved me and other lines that he thought made me feel better.
Sometimes I just wanted someone to say "YEAH THAT WAS SHITTY TREATMENT, THAT MUST'VE HURT, WHAT A CUNT FOR DOING THAT TO YOU, I'M SO SORRY"

If they seem messed up enough you need to start thinking about a conversation with them about contact arrangements and take it from there. It is sounding like it's time for a nasty upheaval and changes though, you don't have a lot of say in the direction unfortunately.
. Be the rock that isn't phased by him, it's all you can offer right now and it will be needed.

I haven't worded that brilliantly!

That is great advice thank you. Its hard not stop feeling that I need to change the situation, but your advice to be the rock is I guess the best I can offer and what I always do for my children. Thankfully they can see the craziness in his reaction and so I hope that means they havnt I inherited his traits.

How old are the children. My eldest. Stopped wanting to see His dad just before he turned 12.

When his dad did shit things I would agree he has every right to be angry. But grown ups make mistakes and can behave badly. I acknowledged what had happened and how he felt.

My son went no contact. His choice. Do the children have any support through school ( current situation aside). My son had counselling in school and they raised a safe guarding. Twice. Once for physical abuse and second for emotional. Which helped my son feel supported and also took the responsibility away from me. So ex couldn't blame me for 'twisting' things.