How often does your ex see your child(ren) ?

[PumpkinP]

Just wondering how often people’s exes see their children? My ex hasn’t seen the children for a few years and has been back in contact and wants to see them. He wants to see them every 2 weeks for a day out (no over nights) just wondering what others do?

Never.

If I were you I wouldn't not allow your ex to have contact unless he jumps through legal hoops and a contact centre. There's a huge chance he will let his dc's down and do them more emotional harm. Better to have no contact than be messed around.

How come your ex hasn't seen the kids for a few years? How old are your kids? I think there's a lot of variables to think about here as everyone's situation is different

He decided that he didn’t want to. It was his choice. In an ideal world I wouldn’t let him have contact but I have no family and keep feeling guilty for my children having no one.

Pumpkin I see you on here a lot. Your ex really let you and your kids down. You don't have to feel guilty for protecting your kids from a loser like this.
You are amazingly strong bringing up four kids, don't let him wrong foot you.
And in answer to your question, high days and holidays only while I do all the graft.

Twice a week evening stays. Once a month for a weekend.

He usually sees them most Saturdays (unless something better comes up).
He hasnt seen them since he dropped easter eggs off at the start of lockdown.

Every Wednesday, and every other weekend. He’s seen dd through lock down, also kept me in nappies milk, wipes, and calpol when you couldn’t get it anywhere. So I’m very lucky.

Hope you can come to an understanding with him op.

SD9 currently stays with us zero because mum says so.

Would love to have her staying here - she's part of our family, but once a fortnight overnight was fine until recently and now none as it March (no contact at all since Lockdown) So on we trod.

You sound like youre doing a good job, I hope you're getting support from somewhere xx

*of March

Be careful. Don’t let him come back only for him to let the kids down again.

Every Thursday for tea, every other weekend and a couple of weeks on the summer holidays and normally a few days each half term

Quite lucky really hearing others stories!!

My ex-h is supposed to have court ordered contact which consists of one Saturday day EOW (no overnights) and one after school for 2 hours each Wednesday. Unfortunately he's not seen him since the weekend before lockdown when I was diagnosed with cancer. OW decided to ban our 9 year old son from their home so that ex-h could not look after him or make things easier for me during treatment. These fucking men grind my gears. You can't pop in and out of a child's life at will and decided you "want" or you don't when it suits you. My response to your ex, OP, would be "please apply to the court". Good luck, I really feel for you

Mine started off EOW. 2 years in he started dropping his weekends at zero notice, currently over a year since they visited him, almost 9 months since they met for lunch.

How old are your kids OP? Do they know about their dad? How do they feel about contact (as in would their thoughts influence you/balanced with what you know is best for them).

After all this time I'd be very VERY slow at the reintroduction, maybe sending a letter or card, then photos, building up to a quick meeting with you there, before any sort of contact without your supervision.

You hold the cards op, and the pp comments about court stand if he gets tricky.