New Will

[Toomanycats99]

Let me start by saying that I know this is not a substitute for legal advice but i'm hoping to get some idea of people have handled this so I am prepared for the legal conversations!

I bought my ex out of the martial home and I live there with our 2 daughters. Equity is around 40% of property value and I have life insurance through work / pension that would pay out enough to clear mortgage should the worse happen.

Ex currently lives with his parents, has some alcohol / mental health issues so currently signed off long term sick. I have limited confidence in his long term earning etc. He is also dreadful with money and spends freely running up credit card bills.

I am wondering how i should structure the will re the house etc - I would be happy for him to live in it with children etc but would rather it was left to them in some way. I assume he would get custody but can you appoint people to oversea and make sure things are OK? My sister has mental health issues as well so don't think it could be her and obviously parents are older so not a long term solution.

Just don't really know where to start but it needs to be done.

This sounds a complicated situation that you should take legal advice on. Mumsnet will just confuse you more.

I agree, you will probably be a dvised to appoint guardians for the children, and the house to them in trust, with him allaowed to live in it

My appointee for my will and children is my sister. The children will inherit the house. Yes their father will be resident parent if he chooses to live in the family home he will have to pay rent to the children's trust.

They can access their trust when they are 25.

You need proper advice as regardless of what you want in a will you can not alter the rights of others You may find your wants are ignored if the other parent has a different view.

If he wants and goes for custody what you want is not his concern.

Hence someone who can give you options and explain if they have any legal validity should be sought.

They can raise suggestions about how any home is to be maintained et c or the other person can just walk away or leave it to decay. They have no contract to do anything they don't want to. Hence you need all areas covered.

I'm in the process of doing exactly this at the moment. I have been told that leaving the house in trust (property trust) between my DCs is best. As their dad would become the one who would look after them, he would be entitled to move into the house whilst he is bringing them up. However as the house will be in trust for the DCs, he cannot get it at all. They also cannot access their trusts until they reach 25 (you can set the age).

@mumblechum0 is who you need. She's a will writing specialist who hangs out on the MN legal board. I believe she is Marlow Wills if you look online.