Hold mediation

[Ciprian99]

Hi guys, I’m a father of a 5 year girl, currently going through separation with her mum, we both work full time.
The question I have: how the process works regarding splitting the parent responsibility, which days they gave you? Or they take in to consideration your working schedule, trying to get my head around this.
Thanks in advance

In an ideal situation the days you want and the days she wants match so it's sorted quickly.

The rest depends on many factors like distance between the 2 houses, your work schedule (can't get childcare if you work nights or if you're in the army and away for long periods)

Every other weekend, an overnight midweek on the week you don't have her and half of the school holidays is a common pattern but this obviously assumes that you can pick her up at a reasonable time. If you live far away obviously something like school holidays for a longer period would be ideal.

Brilliant, thank you for your response
We planning to live both relatively close to her school, the primary and her next school.
We both work full time day time, funny enough I ran the catering in a secondary school, so I have the half term free.
Because of my job and very early start I struggle to take her to school Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, I can go in late on Thursday and Friday, not sure if they take this into consideration?
Great read, thank you

Hopefully you and your ex can agree on a contact pattern that benefits your dd and minimises the amount of time with a childminder or similar.

You might want to find out if her school has a breakfast club/after school club? It's possible that you may need to use it on your day and it's obviously good to know the cost just in case

You decide what the arrangements will be in mediation. The mediator is only involved in facilitating the discussion. Nothing is decided for you. If you can't agree and end up in court, the court will only rule on the specific things you can't agree on between yourselves. The question is only whether your ex will take these things into account at the moment.

As PP said the purpose of mediation is to see if there's common ground so you can avoid court. You won't leave the session with the mediator having decided who gets what days. If you can't agree then a judge will decide in court.

However badly the relationship ended, don't go for an unrealistic amount like more than 50/50 unless there's extenuating circumstances like mum being a drug addict who can't look after dd properly.