Child contact

[maybelle4]

How do you send your child to contact knowing how distressed and upset they’re going to be? It’s breaking my heart

Why is the child upset?

They’ve no idea who their dad is, they’re essentially being left with a stranger at a contact centre which is also a strange place

If it is court ordered, which it sounds like it is, you put as positive a spin on it as possible. Talking in a negative way about it will not help your child. They will be safe and fine and it will only be for a short period. I know it is difficult but it is the best way for this to happen if you have concerns.

I would never talk about it in a negative way to my child and tell them how fun it’ll be etc but they just cry and cry and cry, it’s awful

Oh and yes it is court ordered

How old is your child? How many visits have they had with dad so far?
I had an ex who had no contact with his 1/2 year old daughter while the court process was happening and her mother accompanied her in the contact for the first 6 weeks. Then she waited in the building but out of view in another room for the next 6 weeks in case the child became distressed?
Could something like this be in the best interests of the child? X

My child is one. She has seen her a dad a handful of times over the past year and a bit with me present. I will be allowed to stay at the contact centre but I won’t hear if she’s upset and I honestly don’t trust that contact will be stopped if she needs me

I realise it is difficult but children that age also cry when they are left at nursery. Separation anxiety is perfectly normal at that stage. It is upsetting for you for her to cry but she won't be coming to any harm. I assume at some stage contact will move on from supervised so it is really important that a relationship is established.