What are the consequences of me doing this? Child access related

[Changeembrace]

Previously amicable relations with ex. So much so that when we divorced we didn’t draw up any formal contract re the children (finances absolutely).

So they are with him approximately 5 nights a month (over weekends). He also did three school drop offs.

He has said no longer doing school drops offs. This leaves me completely in the lurch but I’ll manage.

My issue is - I am a little concerned about his mental health. I can’t quite put my finger on it but I suspect very stressed at work and he seems... disconnected.

A very loving kind good father but over weekend, the withdrawing support re school picks ups etc - I feel as though something is up.

I have no concerns about how he would care and be with the children but... well, I suppose I just don’t want them to be with him until I feel more confident about the situation.

He will expect to have them this weekend as it is his weekend. What would happen if o just said no in the legal sense?

Many thanks

if you withold, he could do mediation/court if he really wanted to.

if your amicable,can you not put him to it as "is everything ok,? do you want me to have the kids this weekend so you can have some time off?"

i would not just with hold if you are ok with each other, do it nicely.

any concerns though about welfare yes pull it.

Agree with Carly - he might just need a break (don't we all?) or it might just be a weekday thing. Rushing from work to pick up might be the thing that's stressing him out as he doesn't want to be late and he might have left work incomplete or will have to do more work after the kids go to bed.

Talk to him? Depending on how he feels not having the kids could be a relief or be the only thing that's getting him through. Most people have peaks and troughs with their mental health and yes sometimes seem disconnected but having the routine can get them through. I wouldn't start at withholding contact more of you want to do what you can to support him.

Could it be he has a new partner so he doesn't want the DC overnight or is it just he wants to drop them at yours?

Could he have had a falling out with a fellow parent?

If its amicable and you're genuinely worried you ask how he is.

You dont cut access off.