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Original poster

Am I wrong

8 replies

Newtothis213 · 21/09/2019 21:46

Ex is proposing an amount £100 under recomended cms payment per month and if i want correct amount i need to go through cms. Says he'll spend difference on activities and toys for dd, am i being unreasonable saying i need this money for bills so i can buy toys and do activities with dd?

OP posts:
JoxerGoesToStuttgart · 21/09/2019 21:47

Nope, not unreasonable at all. Go through CMS. Don’t engage with him about child support anymore. Just contact CMS and put in a claim. Dont discuss it with him.

MustardScreams · 21/09/2019 21:49

Always go through CMS. It takes all the control out of the situation and just makes it a standard transaction. He still needs to do activities and take his daughter out, no matter how much maintenance he pays. That’s just parenting.

MusicToMyEars800 · 21/09/2019 21:50

Not unreasonable! Go through cms

GingersAreLush · 22/09/2019 07:58

Go through CMS. What he’s proposing to do (activities and toys) are extras that he should be doing anyway on his time.

Honestly, the cheek of people like this amazes me at times. Even though my own ex behaves in a similar way. He routinely tells our children he can’t even afford the petrol to drive them to the park because he gives ALL his money to me in the form of child maintenance Hmm (he pays the minimum amount so it’s a little over £300 a month) my eldest points out to me that “dad says that but I think he spends most of his money on fags to be honest”. She’s not soft.

Singleandproud · 22/09/2019 08:07

Go through CMS, I went for the middle option, they work out how much ex has to pay for a one off £20 admin fee but he sends it as a Standing order, if he misses any payments I can ring them and upgrade it to the one where they collect and add a charge and take him to court (not needed so far). What I also like about that option is that the review the amount every year so when his wages increases so does the CMS. I have found them very easy to work with compared to the old CSA system which was awful.

pikapikachu · 22/09/2019 10:10

He is being very unreasonable. Child maintenance is for the stuff she needs when she's with you. He has to pay for the stuff that he does with her as an extra. Don't fall for his blackmail.

bettycat81 · 22/09/2019 15:09

If he has her overnight and you have stated that when running through the cms calculator the payment would have dropped to allow for this.

Original poster
Newtothis213 · 24/09/2019 16:37

He doesn't have her overnight due to concerns around his drinking habits.

I'll say one final time and if no joy I'll go through CMS. Thanks for all your thoughts

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