40w pregnant anxious about my 6yo.

[Mumanon72]

I am 40w pregnant and doing it alone. I already have a 6 year old son.
I’m anxious about adjusting to new routines etc and not being able to just rest when I need to, having to do school runs and just generally having the freedom I had when my first was born because I had no other responsibilities but to keep us alive.
I really enjoyed the newborn phase with my son but I am dreading it this time round because I won’t have the peace and rest I had last time as well as the daily stressors of having a special needs child hating school, needing a lot of attention etc. I plan to involve him with the baby etc but I am kind of sad I won’t get to enjoy this baby the way I did with him.
Rambling on and on my brain is frazzled not sure if this even makes sense. Lol.
I don’t have family in the area or many friends to just call on.

Second babies benefit in different ways to first born babies. Yes, first borns get all the peace and attention, but seconds get an older sibling to learn from and be with. Thats' very valuable....so don't feel sad. It's amazing to bring a new baby into the world with a sibling waiting for them.

Re school runs...do you have any help at all with that for when you first get home?

Oh and you're the ideal candidate to recieve some help from Home Start.

www.home-start.org.uk/

This is an AMAZING organisation which exists solely to support parents from all walks of life. They can send someone round to entertain your son in his own home or do your shopping...all kinds. The people are all highly trained and police tested. Mostly older women...Nan type figures.

Yes I’m so looking forward to them having each other but wish me and my newborn had each other all to ourselves and no other commitments. I think I took my sons newborn stage for grantage lol. I hope I don’t seem mean because I love my son so much and don’t want to leave him out at all but I just feel like I have so many weights on my shoulders and just want to relax. It’s quite burdening.

My mum is staying for the week and my family said they will visit and help. She/they will probably be useful practically but not mentally. That’s why I moved away from them.

You will have newborn time when your oldest is at school. Forget housework and just be with your baby then.
How is your oldest at bedtime, does he go to bed easily? Then you would get evenings just with your baby.
It will be fine. Different, but fine.

I remember feeling really conflicted about having my 2nd. I had a big age gap and it just felt sad to be going from just me and dc1 to another baby too.

It was wonderful and the 3 of us were a unit immediately.

I am in the exact same situation, only I’m 7 weeks now and due 1/3/20. I have a 6 year old daughter, I have no family or friends and I’m doing it alone.
My most terrifying thought is doing the school run - if I’ve been awake all night for weeks then I might have an accident in the car. I’m so worried and wish I didn’t have to do it alone. I feel lonely.

Will you not have any support from your baby's father, or your son's father?

It will be easier when your six year old goes back to school. I hope your new baby is contented and that you are well.

Good luck.