We have been split for 5 years. It was very acrimonious, following him having an affair which began when I and ds2 were in hospital after a dreadful birth, both very sick, he was vile to me for 3 years of affair duration until I found out he had sending dick pics to ow whilst lying with our small children getting them to sleep, obviously I chucked him out. He went nuts really, was always aggressive but turned really intimidating, pushed me around, police had to be called, there was a non mol granted. He then assaulted ds1 during contact, I had to stop contact, he dragged it all through family courts who never saw through him and he ended up with nearly 50/50.
Anyway, just a bit of background. He is a vile man, there is no love lost, I’m still unhappy with his parenting etc but there’s nothing I can do. Ds’s appear physically safe with him now but subject to emotional abuse (last week they heard him on phone to ow shouting and crying saying he didn’t want to live anymore” because his birthday wasn’t a great success). He’s 54.
I obviously have to contact him about the kids occasionally. Uniform, school trips, home work, what days he has got them this coming week etc if there’s any variation from the schedule (which I try really hard not to have to minimise contact). It’s never anything controversial and I keep messages business like. We had an email address set up, he claimed not to get emails. Contact books got ‘lost’. Now I resort to texting. The problem is, he barely ever responds. I get a response maybe 1 in every 6 messages. This week I have texted him 4 times to ask what time he is collecting kids tomorrow - half term share - and when I can expect them back. No response until I start getting nasty about it.
All I want is a calm business like exchange of necessary info so I can plan when I can go to work ffs. It shouldn’t be this hard should it?!