Hi, I seem to be posting a lot at the moment and have had some great support and advice so I'm back for more.
I have two DDs who both have additional needs and suffer with extreme anxiety. They don't see their dad (their choice) and don't see many people apart from me. They both have a tutor who comes to the house but my eldest has recently disengaged and won't see her at the moment. Neither of them are comfortable leaving the house very much and DD1 won't come out if DD2 comes too, and I'm not comfortable leaving DD2 on her own as she has panic attacks.
Obviously there are lots of problems, but the one really puzzling me at the moment is how I can better manage their jealousy of each other and how I divide my time between them. Both of them feel I favour the other one no matter how much I try to balance and make things equitable. DD1 is staring to lose all confidence in me and thinks I'm making no effort to deal with it.
To avoid the dreaded drip feed as far as possible; DD2 sees a therapist once a week, DD1 won't see anyone but also feels sad that DD2 gets help and she doesn't. DD1 didn't want to leave the house at all for a long time but would now like to try going out, but finds DD2's anxiety too stressful to cope with if we all go together. At the moment DD2's anxiety is stopping DD1 going out but equally DD1's anxiety stopped DD2 going out very much previously. At home I can rarely get them to do things together. They both have problems recognising non verbal ques because they're both anxious things very quickly escalate and one or both retreat to their rooms.
Does anyone have any bright ideas that I either haven't considered or haven't been able to put into practice? I feel all three of us are unhappy at the moment and there has to be a way to move things on.