10yo DD angry at me an upset due to toxic ex and parental alienation

[DifficultwithDogs]

Due to a real mess of things occuring at the same time. My 10yo DD is really unhappy and pissed off at me, we had until about 10 days ago a really close relationship.

Due to her getting some big tellings off (she'd actually downloaded discord and was chatting with older kids/adults), I think that was the tipping point for her as she shouted at me how much I hated her. She's been pushing a few boundaries ATM and that was the final straw, discovering she went against my express instructions on internet safety.

The day after I discovered my toxic ex has been waging quite a serious campaign of parental alienation.

What I'd like to ask is how can I rebuild things without over compensating, which I'm doing at the moment ?

Any ideas?

TIA

I think you're blowing this out of proportion. You imposed a boundary. She ignored your instructions then shouted at you when caught out.
You still have a close relationship.
'Get Out of My Life but First Take Me and Alex Into Town' might help. It's more for teenage DCs but is very good on the dynamic of boundary setting and boundary pushing.

I agree with Anne this is typical in 10 year old girls the hormones are starting to rage, they push boundaries.
There will be door slamming and probably you will yelled that you are 'the worst parent in the entire world' usually when you have imposed a boundary.
I also found Get out of my life, but first take me and Alex to town a useful read.