Residency- taking lo away

[user1485859001]

Hi.

I now have residency of our little one. Silly question but if I want to go away do I just tell my ex? I don't think he realises what residency means and that I can just take her away without hes permission.

Do I just tell him or ask him?

What do I do if he kicks up a fuss?

I guess it depends what your relationship is like.
I would tell him, not ask - as I would expect the same in return.

Thank you. I worry about everything. I think he will kick up a stink about it being he's weekend etc but I will give him alternative days if he wants to make up for it. I just feel like everything I do I'm worried il upset him and it will cause us to be on bad terms again

Meh. Whatever circumstances have lead you to the point of a residence order in your name, it is only a courtesy to inform the other parent if you are taking the dcs on holiday. Is other contact court ordered? If so it might be contentious/a breach to take them over his weekend. Otherwise offer alternative contact. Give PLENTY of notice so he can't accuse you of springing it on him.

With a residency order you don't need to ask his permission. He would need written authority from you if he wanted to take dc abroad.

Yes I think contact is court ordered. He has once during the week and every other weekend. If it means I arrange to go on the days he didn't have her I would be limited and would never be able to have a two week holiday.

Would I need to take it back to court if he refused?

Yes he needs written permission from me. Though we have agreed one week of the 6 weeks holiday that he can take lo away without asking permission.

Of course you need to tell him you are, as he has every other weekend and a day during the week so he will miss out on lots of dates so you need to tell him?!!
You think it’s court ordered? It either is - or isn’t?

Just play fair as I am sure you would expect the same from him!

Of course I'd let him no. I'm. It just going to go away and not tell him. I meant do I ask him though to be polite or is that giving him permission to refuse. Or just tell him but then I feel like that's rude also. I did say silly question and I overthink things.

Well I'm sorry I'm not in touch with the court situation. Iv never had to go through this before hence me asking. Thanks for ur help anyway

You're not "in touch with the court situation" in relation to your own child? Really?

*edit I'm not just going to go away and not tell him

No i don't no all the terminology and yes I'm a bit simple so it's hard for me to grasp but yes it's court ordered.

There are two separate issues here.

1. Whether or not you can take your daughter out of the country without his permission. This relates to a part of the law that is designed to prevent a parent removing the child from the jurisdiction of the court without the other's consent. As the resident parent, with a court order, you can take the child abroad, within limits (a two week holiday is fine). So you can take your daughter abroad without it being treated as child abduction.

1. When you go, and whether you can take a two week holiday without breaching the child arrangements order. That all depends on what is in the order. You need to start by reading it. It may give you and / or him permission to have a holiday that runs across days when he is due to have her. If it does, it will probably require you to offer up alternative dates, and it will probably require you to make reasonable efforts to mutually agree the dates. If it doesn't explicitly say that you can do this, then you still need to make your daughter available as normal on the dates when she is due to be with her dad. Failing to do so (because you've left the country) would be a breach of the court order.

So, you need to read your court order. No matter what it says, always try tonwork with your ex constructively, and try to find dates etc that work for him as well as you.

Thank you for your reply.

I haven't received the court order in the post yet. It should come any day.

My solicitor did say I could take her away for up to 28days without permission.

I would always let him have alternative dates. My solicitor didn't really mention what would happen if I took her away on the days he has her.

She just said I could take her away for up to 28 days. They didn't mention it in court either. But they did say to make our little one available on the days he's meant to have her. So now I'm confused (clearly doesn't take much)