Half sibling HELP!!

[Lilsysmam]

When I was pregnant with my daughter. My then partner dropped the bombshell that he had also gotten someone else pregnant and she was having a boy. We split. Although he hasn’t really bothered with my daughter. His family have been amazing!! After all this time. Nothing really was ever mentioned about his son. A week ago my daughter asked me ‘Mam , do I have a brother?’ After taking a deep breath. I replied “yes, you do... what makes you ask?” She stated that a lady had walked past her with a little boy. Pointed at her and said “that’s your sister”. I was very angry at first. Because time after time. My ex gets to run away from responsibility’s while every cleans his mess up. But, I didn’t mention it anymore. Today she asked about him again. I messaged the mother. Asking if she had any suggestions. Although my daughter is asking. I still want to protect her and keep her feelings safe. I’m yet to get a reply. But I would love to hear. How people would have approached this situation? Should I have told her she had a brother?

No, I don't think so. She would have worried about it, wanted to see him, and you wouldn't have been able to answer any questions. "Where is he? What's his name?" And there may be more little people around.

this is a difficult one, my childrens father has a child from a previous relationship and he has no contact with him. Ive never told my children as their dad is absent and they will never see the older child. So I can see where youre coming from and I dont think you did anything wrong

Mmm I don't know I guess I would have wanted to find out a bit more information myself before I told her and saw where the situation was.

I don't think either would have been best. Telling and not telling had bad and good points.

Just do what you think is best.

I think you handled the situation well despite the shock. Im sorry I don't have any advice but I am in a similar position and I dread the day something like this happens, my ex cheated and my son has a half brother 7 months younger than him, he also has a half brother 10 years older than him however ex has no contact with that child as he was adopted. I have no idea whether to tell my 2yo when he's older or just never mention it.

My dd was about 11 when she found out she had a sister, it's been a few years but they're great friends now and have a fairly close relationship. I hadn't told her previously as she had never had contact with her dad and she's never had any issue with the fact I didn't tell her. Hopefully it'll work out similar for you and your dd

I told my Ds when he was young . Although he had no contact with his dad didn’t want it to be a shock when he was older.