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Ex has ruined my holiday plans

6 replies

nannytothequeen · 22/01/2019 12:13

I had planned to take my children away next week for a couple of nights. Ex has them at the moment and hes away with them, co-incidentally in the same area I was planning to go to, a couple of hours drive away. I suggested that we meet on Sunday, which is change day, somewhere in the holiday place and the kids can come with me. He agreed and I booked accommodation and booked the cats in the cattery. He has now said that he doesn't want to do that and instead will take them back to his place on Saturday, which is two hours from the holiday place and an hour and a half from me and them bring them to me late on Sunday. Too late for me to leave for the holiday place. If we go the next day we'll only have a day and in any case it's a load more time in the car for the kids. I have texted him to say that this was not the arrangement and he has effectively stopped the kids and I having our break at the beach (summer time here). He has gone silent now and won't answer calls, texts or emails and will simply return the kids to his timetable. I'm pretty upset. I will lose the accommodation money too.

OP posts:
BobTheDuvet · 22/01/2019 17:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

nannytothequeen · 22/01/2019 20:15

He won't let me have them earlier on the Sunday. If we leave as soon as he drops them they will have been in the car for hours by the time we get there and I will be driving on dodgy roads in the dark and arriving at a place with no power in the dark (quite rustic).

OP posts:
Surfingtheweb · 22/01/2019 20:45

No advice how to change this situation as he knows what he's doing & is perhaps doing it on purpose? Or maybe something has come up for him (I agree whatever it is selfish). You can only learn & not book anything based on any agreement that involves him again. :(

ohamIreally · 25/01/2019 07:34

I agree with PP think of this as the price of learning that particular lesson. Don't ever reveal your plans to ex again and don't expect any flexibility or for him to put the kids first.

nannytothequeen · 25/01/2019 07:48

You are quite right. I won't rely on flexibility nor, to be honest, will I give it.

OP posts:
ohamIreally · 25/01/2019 09:25

Quite right. If ex asks to drop DD back early or expects me to bridge a childcare gap I simply state "I am not available for childcare at that time". I do it because I do 95% of all childcare, have no freedom and he still expects me to facilitate him.

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