About to be a single mum

[raspberryjo]

Any advice? 2 kids 4 and 1. Relationship came to a screeching holt and we won't recover. I work part time and am dreading going this all alone.

Only that you can absolutely do this. It's sink or swim isn't it and for the sake of your kids you'll swim!

Say yes to any offers of help from friends, family and neighbours, be kind to yourself - life doesn't have to be perfect.

Good luck x

You’ll be fine. I find it easier on my own. I know it’s scary and overwhelming, and hard and unfair. But you’ll get through it.

If your relationship has been difficult you might actually find it easier, less stressful and regain peace of mind.

So often women function as a lot anyway, even when they are married.

Good luck op you will be fine.

Thank you all for your lovely words. Whilst I feel utterly devastated, it was a hard relationship. Very stressful. And a small part of me is relieved

You will be OK. There are some life hacks that help.. Have bread and milk in the freezer, always have calpol, first aid etc stuff stocked up, have lots of soup or quick pasta so you always do eat something even if after you've done bedtime you're knackered. Get all your finances in order with DD and SOs so you don't have to remember to pay bills, do click and collect or delivery so you don't have to drag them round the supermarket. If you have family /friends to help see if you can negotiate a regular slot each week so you can book appointments for hair, gp, swim or whatever. Try to establish a regular contact pattern and ensure you are not the default childcare for your ex. Good luck.. As other have said in some ways it's actually easier because you can be autonomous and know its all up to you.

That's fab advice! Will be going tomorrow and stocking up, for sure. I'm quite looking forward to having no one to please but me and my babies. They are my main priority. Just how to explain it to the 4 yo?

Im alone with 4, I dont find it easier on my own but its managable. You will be fine.

As for explanations, it depends a bit on why the split happened and what sort of contact pattern you envisage but just a very simple 'daddy lives somewhere else now but you'll see him x and y' for now.

I find it 100% easier on my own. I'm the only one I have to depend on, therefore no disappointment! It's been liberating for me. The kids are happier, I'm less stressed, we're a content little family. They see their dad EOW and all is ok . Good luck OP, you can do it

I'm in the same boat as you (although reasons could obviously be different), he's moving out after Christmas. The sooner the better, it feels so awkward being in the same house now. I only have 1 DD but am so worried about money etc. I know we can both do this though, in six months life will be settled again and will look so much better.