Hoping someone has some advice for me as I’m at a loss of where to go or turn to.
So I left my ex June 2017 as he was emotionally, verbally and sexually abusive to me. He is a very unreasonable and irrational person and trying to co-parent with him has been nothing short of a nightmare. Since July this year he has moved to Denmark where he is originally from to be with his new 21 year old girlfriend and he has now just bought a house with her. He flies back every month to have our son for a week which although isn’t great I’ve been more than fair and tried to just go with it for the sake of peace. In January he wants to now take our son who is 3yo to denmark for a week and I am very uncomfortable with this as I’ve only met her very briefly twice and our son has been suffering from separation anxiety (on both parts) recently and I’m extremely worried about how this will all affect him. I was considering to think about it but the fact that he didn’t even allow me 10 minutes to even think about it before sending me a barrage of verbally abusive messages that have lasted for 4 days then I don’t see why I should even consider it until he learns some respect. He really thinks that he can have it however he wants and if he doesn’t get his way he gets abusive, threatens court, threastens to stop helping each month financially (which he only pays £80 per month at best), threatens to take back all his sons clothes and toys that his parents have bought for him and also tells me how bad of a parent I am, how my son will hate me and how he will turn our son against me. I’m absolutely emotionally and physically exhausted after everything he’s put me through over the last 5 years.
People I have spoken to have said he’s being unreasonable but he still knows how to get in my head and make me doubt myself with all the abuse he sends me. I guess I’m asking for other people’s opinions who aren’t connected to me personally to get some clarity as I always want to be fair to my son and to his dad and would never want to do something that my son would one day hate me for as he’s my absolute world. Any words of advice would be greatly appreciated.