I've just had a telling off about being a bad parent to explainibg law

[disneyspendingmoney]

So, I explained to DC1 about court orders and contempt of court.

I was very matter if fact and gave examples.

My example was that if I told a judge to F* off, and rant that he was wrong, a dope and didn't know the law and that the internet knew better. I'd be in contempt, resulting in a fine or prison.

DC1 has told a teacher she's scared I'm going to prison, teacher has escalated it up the food chain resulting in a call to me.

Which resulted in one of those glib patronising matronly guff of its bad parenting to over share.

Well I nearly lost the plot at that point, she wasn't interested in context, was self satisfyingly smugly important and "intelligent" ( your school's shit love, it's got the lowest rating in the borough and it's maintained that rating for a number of years). No wonder other parents (and teachers) regularly tell me they want to perform various acts of violence on her.

Fucking grrrr

Well, I think it depends on the context. Were you explaining it as an interesting point of law, because DC had heard the term on the news and asked you what it meant? Or does it relate specifically to something that affects your child, like contact arrangements or custody? If the former, fine and it's a good idea to educate children about how the law works, but if the latter, then that could be very frightening and overwhelming for a young child and I can see why she might be distressed and the school might see it as a safeguarding issue.

How old is your child? It sounds like there was a misunderstanding and they thought you’d told a judge that stuff.

Wouldn’t you want to know that your child was scared you were going to prison? Obviously our explanation of court orders left them pretty traumatised if the school needed to phone you about it.

If the school’s so shit, why aren’t you sending your child somewhere else?

Ok point taken. There is a a child arrangement order in place contact order and prohibited steps as well.

I was explaining why I can't break break the contact order to allow unsupervised contact because I'd get into trouble.

I thought I'd separated that from the importance of following law and the consequences of it. Obviously not. But I'm still non-plussed how it turned into what it did.

Dd is 13.

It been on the cards about a shift in school, dd2 primary school welfare teacher suggested it as well and told me a way to fast track it.

I'm actually fuming about the awful way i was talked AT, rather than a dialog leading to a resolution.

Plus I have two mates who are teachers there, who've said as much and a friend's wife who is a head at a feeder school who has indicated it may be a good idea to move elsewhere.

I think this is the final catalyst.

Anyway I dunno if I'm a good or bad parent, I'm just trying to get through each day with the minimum of angst. I'll have successes and failuers, but wow, I haven't been spoken down to like that since I was at school.

She sounds like an unpleasant person who communicates badly.

I would just sit down with dd later and talk through her concerns and reassure her that you are always calm and polite in court!

I'm quiet, polite hand on desk phone off. Yes sir no sir and let my barrister do all the talking completely unless I'm spoken to directly which hasn't happened. Dd1 probably hasn't reslised that because I've encouraged her to stand her ground.

Meh! I was fuming.

I will do just that thank you all for your sensible advice.

I think I'm just going to stop talking to people from now on, there are a crap ton of professionals in our lives, there's no point saying anything from now on, they'll decided stuff with out my input. No one listen to the dd's when they said once a month contact, I guess once a week was so that OH could show some good behaviour. btw that hasn't happened at all OH hasn't done anything about contact.

Sod my life, I've got a talk to give at a conference tomorrow that I haven't written. I'm worn out, dd1 wants to bunk school tomorrow OH is daily and binge drinking ATM but has this idea that she will move back in at Christmas because she doesn't want to spend it with her parents and cousins.

Nope that's it, from now on no more talk, just let everyone get in with it a answer when I'm spoken to with either yes no maybe... Mostly maybe, no always maybe