@caroline1010 It's not your job FULL STOP. If ex actually wants contact, like if ex wants to go to pub with mates, ex organises arranges, negotiated time and turns up. I betcha you don't have to do that for ex and the pub so why should you do it for contact.
It's all part of their stereotype denial narrative, they can accept their own responsibility for fucking up as a parent and partner, so they make it your fault. Something more to whine about, about how unfair it all is and that they are entitled to have what they want, when they want handed in a plate with no effort on their part. Such a sad hard done by story they have, especially they casually forget the reason they nolonger live in the family unit.
As you may guess I'm in a pretty similar sutuation, my ex has my lawyers number, the children's social works number can ex ring either of those? Nope - too hard to press the screen and then talk.
So I'm now left with two kids wondering what the hell is going on. I've got to be careful that I'm acting reasonably so that the court doesn't frown on me and the judge ordered supervised contact.
Sorry to rage dump on you, and I feel for you.