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Getting Scared

11 replies

claire2510 · 18/06/2007 18:25

I want this week over with and Sunday to be here! The strain emotionally of my son meeting his father after never having contact is awful. I am doing it for DS he wants to know Daddy and Daddy after 4 and a bit years of not giving a care wants to be in DS life. I am so scared though. Of what i dont know as he would never come between my son and i, its just the fear of DS being hurt or let down. I have been a mum and dad forever to DS and now the ex wants to be part of us. Not romantically though thankfully. He isnt a bad guy just very weak and lacks facing up to his responsibilities. Luckily i was able to when fell pregnant!!Any focusing advice for help through the week would be good...although planning on early nights to stop me sitting up thinking, drinking and adding to Cadburys profits!!!!!

OP posts:
zmandaz · 18/06/2007 19:06

My DD is only 9 months and so far her Father hasn't wanted to see her. I worry about if he'll change his mind in the future and how it'll affect her. I hope the meeting goes ok for you, stay strong and know that your DS will always love you no matter what. If your ex doesn't stick to his promises then your DS will see that for himself.

mojosmum · 18/06/2007 19:31

keep strong you have helped me so much & would like you to know that im here for you to i find it takes my mind off my situation. but dont let this put you back down its not a nice place tobe as you know.
maybe write a list of things you want to know from him cos it your like me you may forget what you need to know

mojosmum · 19/06/2007 18:39

hi claire how are you feeling today?

claire2510 · 19/06/2007 19:50

Hiya....well im feeling so so, very up and down about sunday but remaining positive as i am doing this for DS no one else. How are you and DD? How are you feeling?

OP posts:
mojosmum · 19/06/2007 20:21

glad your being position, as long as its what you belive is the best for your ds it will be fine you seem to be so sure of what you need to do & i really envy you which i was in the mind state to believe that of me.

me & dd are fine today. ive had a crap day but not aloud it to get me down as much as i usually do.

im getting there im just wish i could wake up in the morning & everything will be great but i know thats not gunna happen that quickly.

dds dad is visiting her tomorrow night & im hoping not to let him make me feel like shit which im sure he will try as he knows ive been getting the upperhand the last 2 times we have spoke.

im going to the solicitors on thursday & the docs on monday so thinks should start to look alot betterby the end of next week ive told dds dad that im going the solicitors but not sure he believes me so im abit worried about his reaction when he receives the letter

claire2510 · 19/06/2007 20:27

Well proove him wrong and get yourself done up not too much though. Show him your doing just fine and be nice to him. Not too nice though!! Your already taking the first steps to the new happy you. You have made appointment at sols and docs and you have accepted it will take time!! Thats the key TIME TIME AND A BIT MORE TIME!!

I know what i am doing is hard for me but it is best for DS. He wants to see Daddy so why should i stop that, i will be there every step of the way and will do all i can to protect and help him. Just wish it was Sunday now,,,,,im too impatient!!!!!

OP posts:
mojosmum · 19/06/2007 20:39

time seems togo so slowly when you are unsure about whats gunna happen.
you have done really well & are very strong you are an amazing person & you dont know what you have done for me think infact im sure i was about to go over the edge but you have helped me take that few steps but & turned me round hopefully the docs & support from others & your kind words will help me take those steps further & further away from the edge til it is just a distant memory

claire2510 · 20/06/2007 19:35

Hiya mojosmum how ar eyou? how was today? im glad that were nearly at Thursday the ex has asked for directions to where we meeting i gave them but didnt wnat to. Havent told DS yet too far away for him to think about. Whats happened with you today? how ya feeling? How are all you mums feeling?

OP posts:
mojosmum · 20/06/2007 19:46

Well dds dad has just left he was quite civil but still feel hes not giving enough thinks to cos i want the apologie i know im never gunna get just gunna has to reside myself to the fact the he is being civil for now [maybe im being abit unfair on him] he as offered to pay towards childcare for dd for next friday as we had crossed wires & he is away when i though he said he would have her. plus he has take into consideration the fact that dd would like her own bed at his house rather than an airbed on the floor & as offered me his other dds cabin bed for when i do dds room.
im abit angry with myself for feeling down today everything seems to have gone right so why do i still feel down???

anyway youve not got long now & at least your dss dad has rung for directions thats a good sign that he is taking it seriously are you meeting on neutral ground? & are you still being positive able the whole meet? i think its only natural to be unsure of the unknown as specially as you are taking your most priceless gem with you i really wish you look

mojosmum · 20/06/2007 19:46

was ment to say luck not look sorry

mojosmum · 23/06/2007 19:13

good luck for tomorrow hope everything goes well for you & your ds

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