Do I do Nothing? Uninterested father..

[cherry1012]

Never ever got Along with ex. He's bitter and jealous of me and partner , tries to make my life so much harder. Dd is 3, he doesn't pay but was having her overnight twice a month. Had a minor disagreement last week and he blocks me as he was in the wrong anyway. He is due to have her this wknd as his night, but has not got in contact for a week and I refuse to chase him for contact. We have no court order as he constantly changes access as in and out of work.
I usually made plans with my partner when he has dd and it winds me up not knowing if he is Guna get in contact or not. If he doesn't we always change plans to include dd
In the past I used to contact him as my dd would ask for her dad n I would feel bad but now i don't want him in and out of her life when he chooses to be. She is an amazing little girl and I just want to get along but its so hard as He is very aggressive too towards me and has intimidated me in the past. I can't keep doing this for the next 15 years .
I feel as though I go to court and get s court order he will break it anyway and cost me money.
Sorry for long post
Any advice welcome Thankyou xxx

if he is aggressive and intimidating towards you i wouldnt trust him about your dd.
if he doesnt contact let it fizzle out and make your plans as if she wont go there.

You may need to get a court order, if he really won't do-operate.

Stick to minimal communication.

Right now you need to know If contact wil, be going ahead. Does he pick up, or do your drop off?

If the former, do nothing. If the latter, drop him a text confirming the time you will arrive with DD. If he is not there, take her away. If contact does not happen, do nothing. Wait for him to get in touch.

You need some nice distractions/surprises for DD whenever there is a possibility she will be let down.

Keep a diary, noting simply when contact due and whether it went ahead.

Thankyou for your replies. He is not a nice person at all and is just vile to communicate with.
I have no way of getting in contact with him now as he has blocked all communication only way would be to ring his parents house phone which is embarrassing. And I always do the drop off to him.
So I'm thinking just to do nothing and let him get over himself and show he wants his dd. I think I'm going to just plan a weekend without him involved.

Also this is really stressing me out having to deal with this all the time never knowing if he is going to be reliable or not as not even a court order would make him reliable

Also this is really stressing me out having to deal with this all the time never knowing if he is going to be reliable or not as not even a court order would make him reliable

Well if you can't contact him you'll have to assume he isn't going to have DD. With a bit of luck you won't hear from him again.

Assume he's not having your DD and forget about him.

I would not drop my dc anywhere I was unable to get in touch

Stop enabling him. Let him do the running if he wants a relationship with his DD. Also get cms involved; he should still financially support her wether or not there is contract.

Keep a diary! you may need to refer to it

it is another way of him trying to annoy you. he knows you will be wondering if he takes her or not.

Thanks for responses.
You are right and it's very annoying but also upsetting for my daughter, as she knows who is he and knows she spends time with him. I have thought about going to see a solicitor just for advice but then again it's about getting him to see his daughter which I can't force him to do. I just know he will eventually contact me and I won't be having it on his terms anymore and I thought legal advice may help ?
V, confused n upset for my child to be honest.

When my Ds stopped seeing his dad I did say we have to wait for daddy to get there n touch with us.

If she then asks has daddy got in touch tell her you will let her know when he does.

A court order cannot force him to have contact.

Time for CMS I think?