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[Cb148]

My husband has decided he's no longer happy in our marriage and is going to move out. We have 2 DC who are 3 and 6 yrs old. I'm currently a SAHM.

He has suggested he has our children EOW. Friday straight from school, all weekend and then drop off at school on Monday morning. Also an overnight every Wednesday.

I would prefer them to be dropped back on a Sunday evening, I think my youngest will struggle being away from me for that long as she's very attached to me. She hasn't been away from me for more than a few hours since she's been born, as she doesn't even start nursery until September.

This is all very new to me and am struggling a bit to deal with it all.
I would really like to know, for those who do EOW - please can you tell me the hours etc that you stick to? Is it through choice or did you go down the legal route so it's set in stone, so to speak? Is your midweek an overnight?

Thanks so much in advance!

The norm is EOW - pick up on a Friday with drop off either Sunday evening or at School Monday + a night in the week.

This isn’t a lot. You say that you’d rather the kids were dropped back Sunday as the youngest will struggle to be away from you. You’d get 10 nights with the kids. Their dad would only 4 nights. It’s not a lot. If the shoe was on the other foot woukd you be happy with seeing your kids for such limited time? If the dad lives near the school there’s no reason why he couldn’t drop them at school on the Monday.

My OH has a very defined contact order (he had to fight his EW for contact). He picks up at 5pm on a Friday and drops back at 4:15pm on the Sunday. The order has been in place since the youngest was 4 (he’s now almost 10). He’s asked her for a midweek and she’s refused. Also asked if he can drop the kids at school on a Monday - she’s refused. He’s taking her back to court for mire conract. Judges are very pro contact and now like to start at 50:50. It’s whats best for the children.

Do you think he would agree to the Sunday with the view to building up to drop off Monday once youngest settles ?

Agree with Starlight. 3 nights away from scratch is a lot. I’d start with EOW Fri to Sun and then increase.

There is no norm. My dc stays with his dad 2 week nights and every other Saturday. But we are flexible on weekends and he will take him Fridays if I need and he is available, or we swap, etc. My friends kids stay with their dad one weekend night and go for dinner two week nights. I actually don’t know any others whose children stay midweek with the NRP. But it works for us and has done for years. DC is 13

I agree there is no norm and every family is different. Our arrangement is eow fri school pick up til 6pm sun and one day in the week for tea. I am happy with this. My ex wants more but on his terms. The way I see it is if I only saw the children over that duration I wouldn’t like it but I would never leave them, so never jepodise that.
Stay strong to what you believe is best for your children as you are their mother x