Split with ex because he was EA and a shit parent. He has been having DC EOW for the last couple of years. He is a Disney dad and buys them everything they want but is very critical of them and bad mouths me to them.
Dd is at an age now where she can tell me what he's been saying and i asked her last week how her relationship with her dad was. Some of the stuff she said is hurtful, if someone said those things abut my mother i wouldnt be impressed. I invited him round to see them so I could listen to the way he speaks to them and I was concerned about a few things. I tried to speak to him about it in a calm way but he blew up completely, called me a fucking c**nt in front of them and stormed off.
He asked to see DC today but they didn't want to see him. He wasn't too impressed about that and he is supposed to be having them this weekend but I just don't think it's a good environment. I don't know what to say or what to do, I'm really lost. I've decided to say I'd rather keep them here because we have a large garden and he lives in a flat so they can't play out (they are always outside here) and see what he says but I'm expecting a huge row.
They are too little to understand that he isn't being fair, they love him and all the treats he gets them keeps them on his side. I feel like the worst mother in the world for fostering this relationship between them for all these years when he's probably been emotionally abusive to them. He was absolutely vile to me, I will never recover from the way he spoke to me and when I left him I thought it would stop but it hasn't, I can't bear the thought that he may be making them feel like that, I feel like a bomb has gone off in my brain.
Has anyone reduced contact time when they have had concerns for the DC? I don't feel like I can say that he can't have them because of what's DD has told me because he may speak to her about it and that could cause her to not tell me again. This is such a mess.